Promises and Dreams
by EmiliosLoofah
Summary: Murder! Betrayal! Revenge! Jessica Tunstall just turned sixteen when her father is killed! Jessica is knowingly out of conrol with a vengence that Lincoln County has never seen before! Rated T for language, violence, and...you know! PLEASE R&R! COMPLETE!
1. New Year's EveBirthday Celebration

**PROMISES AND DREAMS**

**By tk421beth**

**Chapter I _New Year's Eve and Birthday Celebration_**

_**I recently updated this first chapter as of 12/28/05…I had the year wrong inchapters I, IV, VII, VIII and X! If you already read and reviewed...you don't need to read this again! If you haven't...welcome! Please remember to review! Thanks so much!**_

* * *

**_I, in no way, own Young Guns, or Young Guns II. I feel that I should, though! Especially Billy!_**

_December 31, 1877_

_Dear Diary,_

_Father has finally decided to let me go to the New Year's Eve celebration tonight! It took both Doc and Dick to persuade him to let me go. After all, my birthday is tomorrow, I will be sixteen years old! I am so excited! Father bought me a gorgeous green dress…I'm not so sure about the dress, but the party…I cannot wait!_

_Lately, Mr. Murphy and Mr. Dolan have been giving Father more problems, and I feel afraid, like he, or his men, are going to do something to Father. When they come to our home, or to the store, I feel frightened. I feel fortunate to have the 'Regulators' around, protecting us, the store, our home, and so on. Father just tells me that everything will be all right. I am not so sure._

_Jay McCloskey just started working for Father as a Regulator a few days ago and I wonder why Father hired him! McCloskey has worked for Mr. Murphy in the recent past and I don't trust him._

_The other new Regulator, who just joined us a few days before McCloskey, William Bonney, or Billy, seems friendly enough, even though Dick told me to stay away from him. He says that Billy had killed a man. Dick can be very dramatic sometimes! Billy is very nice to me, and makes me laugh. How can he be a killer? Billy also speaks fluent Spanish, which we speak most of the time._

_I hear Father calling me! I will write more tomorrow about the New Year's Eve Party!_

"Jessica! Let's set off!" I heard Father shout, as I close my diary, and glance in the mirror, checking my appearance. My long brown hair was pinned up on top of my head, not hanging down loose at it usually is. I looked different, _older_, I thought. I peered into the mirror again, wondering if I looked a fool. I hardly wear dresses at all, I thought, making a silly face at my reflection, as I turned left and right, checking my appearance. I slowly found myself smiling, thinking that maybe I _did_ look okay. I quickly ran down the hall, and stood on top of the stairs, since Father was still continuing to shout for me to make my appearance. I look down, and saw Father and all the Regulators waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs. They were all clean and dressed up, and looked good. Father was busy checking his watch. "Jessica's late _again_," He sighed. "She's just like her Mother…never on time! Damnation! Jess-!" Father started to yell my name again, but upon seeing me, abruptly stopped, as I slowly walked down the stairs. I suddenly halted halfway down, feeling my face redden, as everyone was staring at me, all with dumbfounded expressions. _Should I be flattered or mad? _I notice all of them glance at the portrait behind me, of my Mother, dressed in the most elegant gown I have ever seen, looking more beautiful than any other woman I have ever met. I glimpse at the painting, and then back at Father and all the Regulators. My mouth goes dry, as they all take off their hats, all at the same time! _What the heck was going on here?_ I looked at Billy, who was standing next to Father. He had a huge grin on his face, his blue eyes twinkling in mischief. I felt my face go red again, much to my chagrin.

"How handsome you all look!" I greeted them all. "Now, how do I look?" I asked, twirling around, showing off my new dress. They all _still_ looked flabbergasted, and I almost laughed out loud. The expressions on their faces were priceless! With the household tasks, and working at the store, it was just easier for me to wear trousers, shirt and boots.

Father stared for a moment, his mouth still open in surprise. "You look beautiful, Jessica, just like your Mother." He told me. "That dress brings out the color of your eyes."

"Thank you, Father." I could feel my face flush again. _Father thought I looked like Mother? Impossible! Mother was so beautiful!_

"She's actually wearing a _dress_!" I heard Steve cackle. "Jessie's really a girl!"

I shot Steve a look of annoyance, my hands balled up in fists. "Shut up, you inbred, dim-witted-"

"That's enough, Jessica!" Father cut me off. "Let's go to the party!"

* * *

The party was already in full swing when we arrived. At first, I did not let Father out of sight, as I listened to the women gossiping about everybody and all that was happening in town. All they wanted to do was to get married and have children. I shuddered at the thought! _In two more years, I will be eighteen…considered an old maid by then!_ I, in no way, wanted to wed _or_ bare children. My plan was to one day take over Father's business. I already did the bookkeeping and inventory for him. Father knew of my dreams of running his store and ranch, and was pleased about it. He didn't seem in any hurry to marry me off, thank God!

I stood alone, preferring to watch everyone in town talk, drink, laugh and dance. Father was speaking with Alex McSween and his wife, and I could see Steve, Charlie and McCloskey helping themselves to several drinks. I am having a good time, even though I was by myself. The food was outstanding, the music excellent. Everyone was in good spirits and having a fantastic time!

"Want to dance?" Billy's voice interrupted my thoughts. He was standing in front of me, wearing his new suit, and that silly grin on his face. His hand was out to receive mine. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Dick stare angrily at Billy.

"I don't know..." I started to say, unsure of myself.

"You can trust me, Jessie!" Billy said, gently taking my hand, and leading me towards the other couples that were dancing. I suddenly felt nervous, and my stomach felt like it was doing flip-flops as we began to dance. Billy indeed was a _very_ good dancer! I soon was smiling, and then laughing at Billy's jokes and antics. I could see Dick talking to Doc, and pointing at Billy and I. Dick seemed upset, as he glared at us, while I could see Doc chuckling and grinning.

"Dick treats you like you're his younger sister." Billy pointed out. "That, or and old mother hen!" He laughed.

"I've known Dick since I was a child. He means well."

We danced for a few more minutes, until Dick came up and asked Billy if he could cut in. Billy let Dick take me.

"What's this all about?" I asked as innocently as I could, as Dick and I began to dance. I could see Billy join Charlie, McCloskey and Steve for a drink.

"I _told_ you to stay away from him, Jessica." Dick said with a sour expression on his face. His arms went around my waist, as if protecting me. _Protecting me from Billy?_

"So?" I answered. "I'm _not_ doing anything wrong." What the _hell_ was this about? "It was _just_ a dance!"

"I don't care, Jessica." Dick looked down at me. "You better listen to me. _Stay away from Billy_." He warned.

"You are _not _my Father!" I spat. "I don't have to listen to _you_." I pushed him away from me, and promptly left the dancing area.

A few seconds later, Dick caught me by my upper arm, stopping me and forcing me to look up at him. "You indeed, have to listen to me, Jessica." Dick pointed out. "_I'm_ the foreman of the Regulators, and my major concern is for your welfare. I don't want to see you get hurt."

I felt myself calm down. I knew Dick worried about me. He truly is the older brother that I never had. "I'm not going to get hurt, Dick. Would you quit worrying?"

"All right, Jessica." He let go of my arm. "I'll trust you."

* * *

The next morning, we were heading back to the house. I was seated next to Father in the buckboard, my head resting on his shoulder. I had been up all night, dancing with Father and _all_ the Regulators. We all had a really good time. I would never forget it.

"Did you have a good time?" Father asked me.

"I had the best time!" I told him, yawning. "But I'm _so_ tired! I want to go to bed!"

Father laughed. "Here, is this for you" Father said, handing me a small box. I opened it, to see a lovely silver ring. It was a simple band, the kind that I have wanted for some time. _'Happy 16, JMT, 01/01/78'_, was written on the outside of the ring.

"Oh, Father!" I gasped, placing the ring on my finger. It fit perfectly. "It's beautiful! Thank you!" I hugged him tight.

Father laughed as he returned my hug. "I wanted to be the first gentleman to present you with a ring." He told me. "I hope you have a _very_ happy sixteenth birthday!"

"I will!"

A flock of wild turkeys suddenly few out from a nearby shrub, and started flying south. The Regulators looked at each other, and started shouting excitedly, racing their horses towards the birds, with their guns out. Turkey does taste good!

Billy was riding next to us, his eyes lit up, smiling. "Jessie? Ride with me?" He asked me.

I looked at Father, who was smiling at me. "You can go, Jessica. Be careful!" He told Billy, as I took Billy's hand, and seated myself in front of him. Billy handed me one of his guns, and we took off towards the direction of the other Regulators.

As we rode away, I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Something was wrong…very…_wrong_. I looked over at Father, who was alone in the buckboard. I could see Murphy's men surround him. Where the hell did they come from?** "No…FATHER!"** I shouted, making Billy stop the horse. He too, looked over at my Father. Father was now standing up, attempting to talk to Murphy's men.

Murphy's men simply raised their guns. Father looked at me, with a small smile on his face. _There was nothing he could do!_ Murphy's men started to shoot! Father only stood for a moment, and then fell over backwards on the ground, dead.

"**NO! NO! NO!"** I was shouting, as I slipped off of Billy's horse. Running as fast as I could in my dress, I headed towards Murphy's men, who were still there. Tears blurred my vision, as I raised the gun in my hand, and started shooting.

I could hear the Regulators shouting my name, but I did not pay any attention. Through the tears, I see that Murphy's men are racing towards me, with their guns drawn, aiming to shoot. Nothing mattered, I thought, as I ran on, still shooting my gun. Billy rode up next to me and suddenly caught me by my waist, and hauled me up on his horse.

Without a word, we rode off with the other Regulators. We rode what seemed like hours, until we felt Murphy's men were no longer following us.

Billy helped me off his horse. "Jessie?" He said, looking at me. "Jessie! Are you all right?" He looked alarmed.

I didn't say anything. My eyes blurred, and I felt weak. I welcomed Billy's hold as I blacked out in his arms.


	2. Broken Promises and Shattered Dreams

**Chapter II-Broken Promises and Shattered Dreams**

_Special thanks to Naomi-my beta! You Rock! Peace out!_

_**Authors Notes: There are a few small passages in Spanish. I won't do it again, I don't like the way it looks, and I can't use the star symbol, I just realized. The English translation in on the very bottom of the chapter! Please read and review! Thanks!**_

I awoke to voices, voices talking about myself and Father. It felt like I was in my own bed. I didn't open my eyes as of yet. My head hurt, and my face was wet from tears. Father was _dead_.

"What's going to happen to Jessica?" I heard Doc say, his voice filled with concern.

"Alex said it's all been taken care of, in John's will. Jessica will go live with Alex." I heard Dick say. _Oh, no! I don't want to go with them! Alex and Susan McSween are nice, but they won't understand that I need to avenge Father's murder._

"Bullshit!" Billy spat. "She wants revenge, and so do I." _How in the hell did he know that? I didn't say anything to anyone!_

"This is none of your affair, Billy!" Dick shot back.

"It is now, Dick." Billy answered.

My right thumb caressed the silver ring that was on my finger that Father had just given me. I knew deep in my heart Billy would help me, if none of the other Regulators would. I _knew_ in my heart that the Regulators swore an oath to protect me and Father. Didn't they want to have their vengeance? After all, Murphy's men killed Father, their mentor, their employer.

I slowly open my eyes and groaned in pain. Wiping the dried tears from my hot face, I notice that all the Regulators are standing in my room with arms crossed.

"Jessica!" Dick gasped, rushing towards my bed, as I slowly sit up. "Are you felling all right?" He asked, holding my hands.

"Well, no, Dick. My Father is dead. How are you?" I glared at him.

Dick held me close. "Everything is going to be all right, Jessica. You're going to stay with Alex and Susan for a while."

"The _hell_ I am!" I said, pushing Dick away from me. I jump out of bed. I'm just wearing my nightshirt, with some cotton long johns, but I don't care _who_ the hell sees me like this. "I'm going to _kill_ Lawrence Murphy." I say, calmly, as I grab a pair of trousers, and put them on. "That _goddamn_ motherfucker!" I whisper. The Regulators were silent, as I put on a shirt, and picked up my holster. I buckled it around my waist, and checked my guns. They are loaded and ready. I tied my knives around my thighs, just under the holsters. Thank God Dick taught me how to shoot and Chavez taught me how to throw knives.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see all of the Regulators staring dumbly at me. How can they _not_ understand how I feel? That I _need_ to do this! How could they not feel the same way? He was like a Father to most of them. They are like brothers to me.

I heard Billy laugh, this crazy high-pitched laugh, as I put my boots on.

"Jessica!" Dick said, grabbing my arm. "You will do no such thing!"

"**The fuck I will, Dick!**" I screech. "You can't tell me what to do! _My_ Father is dead!" Someone needs to do _something_! You're not going to do anything about it! I'm going to _kill_ them!"

"You're just a child. You can't do anything, Jessica." He says.

I reached out, and slapped Dick across the face. _That_ took him by surprise. "Fuck you, then! You don't want retribution? After all that my Father has done for you?" I glared at Dick, who looked at me like I was some crazy woman. I could see his cheek redden from where I slapped him.

As the others gasped in shock, I grabbed my shotgun, and started to walk out of my room. Charlie and Chavez stood in my way, arms folded across their chests. "Move the _fuck_ out of my way!" I shouted, aiming my shotgun at them.

"She's gone crazy!" I heard Doc whisper in shock.

Before I could do anything, Charlie grabbed me, as Chavez yanked the shotgun out of my hands. I was screaming with rage, kicking, and hitting anyone who came close to me. This didn't even slow Charlie down, as he threw me on my bed.

I went to get up again, but this time, Dick pushed me back down on the bed, my face in the mattress, my right arm twisted behind me. I screamed again, as Dick straddled me, as if I were a calf about to be tied. I couldn't move.

"You _will_ calm down, Jessica!" He demanded. "You are _not_ leaving this house, you understand?"

"You're hurting me, you fucking bastard!" I screeched, trying to move, but to no avail.

After a few moments, Dick got off of me, and walked towards the door. I noticed he looked very upset, as he looked at me with concern. I slowly sat up. My breathing was laborious. The Regulators were all looking at me in shock. I could feel the tears start again.

"Jessica," Doc sat down next to me. "We're all upset. We are going to have Alex talk to the J.P. for us." _He is The Justice of the Peace. What the hell will he do? _"We want to be deputized. We want to bring in Murphy's men."

"So, you all want to help me?" I asked, sniffing. My throat hurt from crying, my heart hurt from the pain of losing Father.

"Shit, Jessie!" Billy said, also sitting down next to me. "We _all_ want to bring Murphy down." He placed my hand in his. I did not pull away, much to my surprise.

I looked over at Charlie, Chavez and Dick. "I'm sorry." I said, choking on the words, for I was now crying loudly. "I'm sorry."

"That's okay, Jessie." Charlie said, looking uncomfortable, as he and Chavez moved closer to my bed. Dick looked upset as he too, walked towards me.

Chavez offered me his sash, and I blew my nose in it, as Billy held me close to him. How could I doubt my Regulators? Of _course_ they wanted to help me. "I'm sorry." I whispered, as Billy rocked me back and forth, as you would a child. "I'm sorry." I mumbled over and over again. Suddenly feeling tired and ashamed from my outburst and the day's affairs, I closed my eyes, sighed, and relaxed against Billy. I felt my hot tears drip down my face, as I clung to Billy for comfort, my face buried in his shoulder. I felt my body relax, as his arms slowly envelop me, as he gently strokes my hair.

* * *

At the funeral, I stood between Doc and Billy, as Dick read some passages out of the Bible. I bit my lip to stop myself from bursting into tears once again. I think Billy sensed this, and he reached for me hand, gently squeezing it. 

The only people at the funeral were the Regulators, Alex and Susan McSween and I.

My Father's casket was now being lowered into the ground.

Mother died when I was a little girl. And now, Father is dead. I knew now the Regulators would take care of me. Dick told me himself that protecting me was his main concern.

"It's time to go, Jessica." Dick told me.

"No." I whispered.

"Jessica, please." Dick told me, gently touching me shoulders, and trying to make me walk with him.

"I said, **NO**!" I shouted, pushing him away. Everyone turned to look at me in surprise. "I'm not ready to go yet." I said calmly.

I could feel Dick staring at me, as my eyes filled with tears, as I watched the dirt being thrown onto Father's casket.

"**No, No, NOOOOO!**" I screamed, kneeling onto the ground. "**PLEASE, FATHER! DON'T LEAVE ME!**"The tears started flowing again, as I clawed the ground. "Stop it!" I told the old man, the gravedigger, who was throwing the dirt. "**STOP IT!**" I shouted, as I ran up to him, and punched him in the face as hard as I could.

"Jesus! Jessie!" Billy said, grabbing me, pulling me away from the man, who now was on the ground, trying to get his nose to stop bleeding.

Before anyone could do anything, I broke away from Billy, and ran over to Murphy's Store. Mr. Murphy and all of his men were there, watching the funeral from a distance.

"You fucking bastard!" I yelled, pointing me finger at him. Mr. Murphy looked at me in surprise, then amusement. That made me even angrier. "I'm going to **KILL YOU!** **DO YOU HEAR ME, OLD MAN? YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD!**"

Mr. Murphy and his men just laughed. "I like to see you try it, young lady." He told me.

"Shit! Jessica!" I heard Dick run up behind me, and then grab me by the waist.

"**I WILL KILL YOU!**" I shouted again, as Dick dragged me away from the street.

* * *

Much later, I was standing with the Regulators, as Alex spoke with Wilson, the Justice of the Peace. He was going to try to convince Wilson to Deputize the Regulators, giving them power to serve Murphy's men with arrest warrants, for the murder of my Father. 

The Regulators were standing around and looking over at Alex and Wilson. I noticed Billy writing something on a small slip of paper. He winked at me, and put the paper in his pocket. I wondered what he wrote.

"Well, Jessica," Dick gave me a small smile. "This will be goodbye, until we come back." He gave me a huge hug, and kissed my cheek.

"Please come back soon." I told him, hugging him back, and I gave him a quick kiss.

"Hey, Bonita, we'll be back soon." Chavez told me.

"We promise, Jessica." Doc told me.

One by one, I kissed and hugged the Regulators goodbye. Billy was last, and I was glad. By this time, the others had walked over to a nearby barn, where their horses were placed, and headed inside.

"Well, Jessie, I _know_ I'll see you soon." He told me, with that crooked smile. Billy reached for my hands, and slowly caressed them with his calloused fingers. I gasped in surprise, as my belly felt like a hundred butterflies were flying around inside. He chuckled, as if he _knew_ what I was feeling! Billy then softly kissed me on the cheek. I stared into his blue eyes, as he stared into my green ones. I felt nervous, afraid and excited all at once.

Feeling the warmth from his hands, we barely noticed Wilson walk over to the barn, were the other Regulators were. "It looks like we're going to be the law now!" Billy said excitedly. A wide grin spread across his face.

I nervously smiled and said, "Yup, you're going to be Deputies."

Billy then gave me a serious look. "Nosotros vamos atrras Henry Hill primero. Aqui el decrections." Billy reached into his pocket, and placed the note he wrote earlier in my hands. "Hasta luego, Jess." He told me, walking towards the barn.

I was staring vacantly over at the barn for a few moments, deep in thought. I abruptly remembered that if it wasn't for Billy, I also would be dead. Billy had wanted me to ride with him, as the Regulators chased the pheasants. I clearly remembered Billy helping me on his horse, and handing me one of his guns. Goosebumps spread over my body, as I thought, Billy, unknowingly saved my life. Murphy's men would have killed me too, without hesitation.

My mouth went dry. _I owed Billy my life_.

"Jessica!" I heard Alex call me. I walked over to Alex and Susan.

"Well, Jessica. Shall we go? We have much to discuss."

"Like what?" I asked, folding my arms in front of me. Alex _just_ wouldn't understand. I _needed_ to join the Regulators. I _needed_ revenge! I didn't want him to know this, of course.

"Well, you know your Father left a will." Susan told me. "He named us as your guardians, if anything happened to him."

"I understand." I said calmly. "I just want to go by the house and pick up a few things."

"I should escort you, Jessica." Alex said.

"No, that's okay. I won't be long, Alex." I smiled innocently at him, then Susan. They seemed to believe me, as I mounted my horse.

All of a sudden, the Regulators shot out of the barn, all wearing badges. They are now deputized men. _They_ would help me avenge Father's death.

They rode off in a hurry, and I saw Billy wink at me as he went by. Funny, how we have only known each other for a few days, and Billy knows _exactly_ how I feel, _exactly_ what I am thinking, and _exactly_ what I'm going to do!

* * *

Arriving home, I quickly dismounted, tied up the horse and ran into the house. I knew I did not have much time, so I needed to pack as quickly as possible. I didn't want Alex to come by! As I looked around the house, I knew I would never return, but had no tears left to cry. _I won't ever cry again._

I got out of my dress, and put on my new brown trousers, white shirt, back vest. I put on Father's favorite red scarf around my neck. Black boots, brown hat and brown chaps completed my outfit.

I looked in the mirror. I did not see a smiling sixteen year old girl anymore. I saw an angry young woman, and on this day I swore I would kill Lawrence Murphy myself. _The reckoning was coming_. "I will avenge you, Father. I swear." I whispered, as I picked up my saddle bags and other miscellaneous items, and headed off, to locate the Regulators.

* * *

I did not ride for long before I found the right place. Of course, Henry Hill would be here, to gamble, to drink, and sleep with whores. Slowing down, I spotted the Regulators, still on their horses. I didn't want them to see me as of yet, so I stayed behind, so that no one knew I was there. I could see that only Billy was missing. Oh, God! Was he inside that sordid place? What was happening? 

No sooner than I thought that, I heard a gunshot. Billy came running out of the outhouse, laughing. I smiled as I saw him land in a huge pile of horseshit! The few people that were there were shooting back at Billy. The Regulators all picked up their guns, and started shooting back.

"Billy!" I heard Dick yell at him in anger. "You weren't supposed to smoke anybody! We have warrants! We're the law!"

Others were now shooting at the Regulators. The Regulators held their own, and managed to kill most of them.

Quietly as I could, I rode over to Billy's horse. I grabbed the reins, and rode over near the outhouse, his horse following. The other Regulators were now riding the hell out of here.

"Billy!" I shouted over the commotion.

Billy saw me, smiled, and ran over. He quickly mounted his horse, and we rode off together, joining the other Regulators.

* * *

Beautiful 

We're going after Henry Hill first

Here are the directions


	3. Newspapers and Peyote

**Chapter III Newspapers and Peyote**

_Special thanks to my beta/co-author, Naomi! You rock! Also, Sue thanks for your comments and suggestions! _

We were hiding out in Lincoln, for a moment, behind Father's store. Doc was reading us the paper, about Henry Hill being killed, and the other people that were either mortally wounded or also killed. I smirked when Doc read that 'A Kid' nineteen or twenty is the Captain of the Deputized gang. _Billy…Captain?_ I'm sure Dick _loved_ that! The paper _also_ mentioned my name, aged sixteen that rode with the Kid's gang. _What the_ _hell_? I didn't even have my gun out! _Who saw_ _me?_ So, it looked like I was now involved in the Henry Hill killing. _That's just great!_ Murphy's men were going to be after me for sure now.

"We need to talk." Dick told me, holding my arm as we walked away form the others. Dick all of a sudden grabbed my shoulders, and shook me in anger. "Why did you follow us? You were _supposed_ to go with Alex and Susan! What the _hell_ is wrong with you? You could have been killed, Jessica!"

I was speechless for a moment. I have never had seen Dick so upset. His fingers painfully gripped my shoulders, as his brown eyes flashed with anger. I could see the other Regulators stopped what they were doing to watch us from afar. I saw Doc's worried face, as they all walked slowly up to us.

"You're _hurting_ me!" I said, roughly pushing him away. "I can't stay with Alex or Susan now! They'll kill me, if I stay," I explained. You know I'm right, Dick."

"You don't know that." He argued. By now, the other Regulators were surrounding us. "There's a hell of a _lot_ that you don't know."

"Yes, Dick. There _are_ some things I indeed do _know_." I spat at him. "_I_ am to inherit everything! They want me dead, too, don't you see? I was supposed to be in the buckboard with Father when they killed him! Why _else_ would they say I was involved in Henry Hill's killing? I didn't even pull out my gun!"

"Jessica's right, Richard," Doc said. "We have to protect her. They'll go after her, if she stayed here. She _has_ to stay with us."

Dick looked at Doc, then back at me. "I'm not so sure, Doc. Things have changed. It's _too _dangerous for her to stay with us."

"It's too dangerous to let her go back." Billy pointed out.

Dick gave Billy a hard look. "I know you had something to do with this." He hissed, pointing his finger at Billy's face. "I can't prove it, but I know, Billy."

"Billy's right, Richard," Doc pointed out. "She _has_ to ride with us." Doc then touched my shoulder. "Jessica knows irons, Richard. She can take care of herself."

That much was true. Growing up, I learned how to handle various firearms from Dick and Doc, who have been employed with Father for several years. Chavez has taught me how to handle knives also.

After a moment of thinking, Dick nodded at Doc. "It seems so." He calmly decided. "Jessica, I _never_ wanted you to be involved in this."

"I got involved when my Father was murdered, Dick."

Doc looked out on the street and suddenly threw the paper down. "I have to go. I'll be back in a second." He told Dick.

_Where is he going_? I looked out, and saw Doc talking to Yen, Murphy's China Doll. I grinned. So! Doc _liked _Yen!

"So, Dick!' Billy piped up, checking his guns. "Who's next?"

Dick shot Billy another dirty look. "You."

* * *

As we traveled, we knew that some of Murphy's men were on our trail. We decided to hide, and waited for them to come straight into our trap.

Crouching from my hiding spot in the bushes, I could see it was William Morton and Frank Baker. _Murphy's men. _I grabbed my gun, and pulled the hammer back, chambering the round, preparing to fire. I glanced over at Billy who was next to me. He also took out his pistol.

Morton was talking to Baker, holding a piece of horse poop. He stated that our horses have been grazing wild. "Pretty good, huh Baker?"

I smiled, seeing Chavez quietly move behind Morton, twirling his knife, and then held it at Morton's throat. "Not _that_ good." He commented.

I then jumped up, aiming my gun at them. Dick rode his horse up beside me, also armed, as Doc jumped up with his shotgun out. The rest of the Regulators jumped or rode up, surprising Baker and Morton.

"Buenos Dias, shitheads." Dick greeted them.

"By killing Henry Hill, you all started a war, Dick." Baker said, with his arms up.

"By killing Mr. Tunstall, you all started the damn war, Baker!" Dick shot back.

Morton looked over at Dick and I. He shot me a look of surprise, and then smirked. "It's fifty to sixty men against you what-seven or eight?" He pointed out.

I watched Billy walk behind Morton. "We're going to bury you and you can believe that." He whispered, waving his gun, startling Morton.

"Quiet, Bonney." Dick said. "We're taking you to jail. No killin'."

"Objection, your honor," Billy yelled out. "These boys are going to the grave, in the name of John Tunstall."

I watched as Dick glared at Billy. "I said, quiet, Bonney! I don't need that kind of talk. Law don't talk like that."

"Yeah, well, law don't kill innocent merchants either." Steve pointed out.

"Shut up, dirt face." That was from Doc.

Billy smiled over at me. "We'll take the sons of bitches up to Capitan Mountain and blow their brains out, what do you say, Jessie?"

I laughed loudly, similar to Billy's, as I walked up to Morton and holstered my gun. Morton looked relieved for a moment, but I then pulled the shotgun out from behind my back, and aimed it inches away from his face. Morton looked down at both barrels and suddenly turned pale, much to my delight. "That sounds real good to me, Billy."

"**Jessica!**" Dick shouted.

McCloskey walked up to Billy. "Billy, Jessie, take it easy." He told us. McCloskey then began to talk to Billy, Dick and I, saying instead of going south, we should just ride straight into Lincoln.

My eyes narrowed as McCloskey talked. I had told Father I did not trust him, from day one. He was once part of Murphy's men, and I now wonder if he still is. McCloskey was still talking, and I suddenly felt a slight chill, as the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I have a strong feeling that he is still was part of Murphy's men! _He had to be!_ I glanced over at Billy, who was now looking at me with a raised eyebrow. Billy then slowly nodded at me, and gave me a small grin. He _knew_ what I was thinking.

"Hey!" Billy said.

"What?" McCloskey answered.

"I saw that!"

"What'd you see? What'd you see?" Charlie anxiously asked Billy.

"He knows what I saw! Where's the ambush, McCloskey, in Lincoln?" He demanded, pointing his gun in his face. McCloskey began his defense, started walking backwards, right into Doc. I _knew_ he was lying. Dick tried to reason with Billy, but to no avail.

"He's a spy!" Billy shouted angrily.

Dick did not believe this. "He made a pact with us; he's a Regulator, right McCloskey?"

"No! He's one of Murphy's men!" I proclaim, aiming my shotgun now at McCloskey. I notice Dick then gave _me_ a dirty look. I gradually lowered my gun back down, giving McCloskey a hard look. _He knew I knew!_

"Jesus, Jessie, that's not true!" McCloskey told me, then turned back to face Billy. "Jesus, Billy, c'mon!" McCloskey said, offering his hand to Billy in friendship.

Billy kept his gun on McCloskey for a moment, and then put his gun back in the holster. _What was he doing? Kill him! Kill him now! _"Shit, sorry, McCloskey." He shook his hand.

"It's all right, Billy. We're all upset about John."

"I'm sorry I didn't sniff you out sooner," Billy said, pulling his gun out again. "You goddamn traitor!" Billy yelled, as he shot McCloskey in the head.

"Billy, No!" I heard Dick yell. My eyes widened in surprise, as McCloskey's brains were sprayed all over Doc's face.

Chaos reigned, as Morton and Baker both began to run and ride away. Without hesitation, I quickly aimed my shotgun at Baker, and shot him in the back. He went down, in the bushes, dead.

"No!" Dick was shouting, as they all were shouting and shooting. I saw Chavez throw his knife at Morton, who was trying to ride away. Morton slowed down a little, but was still riding away. I quickly threw my shotgun on the ground, and pulled out my pistol. Running now, I aimed my gun. "Don't let him get away!" I heard Doc shout, as I shot Morton in the head. He fell off his horse, and lay dead.

Suddenly, it was all over. Three Murphy men were now dead. "Court adjourned!" Billy announced, as I walked back. Reaching down, Billy took McCloskey's badge from him. "Good job, Jessie! You deserve this." He said proudly, tossing the badge to me. "Didn't feel right, him having one."

"**Moron!**" Dick yelled at Billy, as I pinned the badge above my heart. "You're out of line, you son of a bitch!"

"Richard," Doc told him, "He was right! Jessica was right! McCloskey was acting kind of strange."

"That means we killed three more of Murphy's men." Dick sighed. "Okay, everybody, we're going to skin up the river!" He shot a disgusted look over at Billy, and raised his gun in Billy's face. "You better stop believing newspapers! You ain't no Captain, and you sure in hell ain't no Robin Hood!" Dick then put his gun away and then looked at me, pointing his finger. "And you ain't no Maid Marion!" He yelled.

I glared straight back at him, but didn't say anything.

"Whatever you say, Dick." Billy calmly told him, as he mounted his horse.

* * *

We now were in the middle of God knows where, and Doc was reading the paper once again. The paper idolized Billy, as he is now called, Billy the Kid, and the many adventures with 'his' Regulators. "It's said that pretty Jessie Tunstall, is Billy the Kid's sweetheart," Doc began to read, looking over at me and smiling. _What? Where'd they get that from? I'm no one's sweetheart! _"Jessie is as deadly with a gun, maybe even more so than Billy the Kid himself." _Oh, God!_ I could feel my face turn red, as Steve and Charlie laughed so loud, I almost punched them! "They named you too, Jessica." Doc said. He paused for a moment, I supposed for dramatic effect, and then said, "The Sweetheart Shooter!" Now all of them save for Dick, were laughing loudly.Dick just rolled his eyes in disgust. I shyly looked over at Billy, only to find him smiling at me. I quickly looked away, my face flushing again, as he chuckled. Doc read on. "It's says here this is Billy the Kid. Only it's not Billy."

He then showed us the paper. It was a drawing of Dick!

"It's bullshit!" Dick groaned. "Papers can't do anything right."

The paper also stated that John Kinney was after us, and that he is a bounty hunter.

"What's that mean?" Steve wondered.

"It means that he can whoop some ass!" Charlie told him.

Dick called Doc over to him, as Billy, Charlie, Steve and I continued to read the paper. I glanced over at Dick and Doc and wondered what they were talking about. They probably were talking about how we were stuck, and could not go north, south, east or west. I wondered what we were going to do. I glanced down at my ring, wondering what Father would do in this situation.

"Sweetheart Shooter!" Steve joked, spitting tobacco at the same time. "Christ, that's _funny_!" He laughed. Charlie was also laughing. Steve grabbed a lock of my hair and sniffed it. "C'mere, Jessie, give us a kiss!" He laughed.

I quickly pulled out my gun. "Where do you want that kiss, Steve?" I asked, pointing it at his face. That made Billy, Charlie and Steve scream in laughter. "**Shut the hell up, all of you!**" I yelled. This was _so _embarrassing! Billy couldn't stop grinning at me. God! Is that all he does, is smile? What the _hell_ could Billy so happy about? Disgusted, I holstered my gun and slowly walked away from them.

I glanced over to see Chavez picking at some roots from the snow, and collecting the samples in his hat. _What's he doing?_

"What the hell is he doing?" Dick wondered out loud, as we all started to unpack.

* * *

It was nighttime, very late, and the stars were still twinkling above us. The sun would be up soon, I thought, as we all were sitting around the campfire. I was sitting in between Billy and Dick. Chavez was holding a cup, and his face was painted black and white, like a skull.

"We've come to a place where we are lost, no? When an Indian is lost, he must reach into the Spirit World, to find a way. He'll be shown a sign. This is the way to the Spirit Road. We're lost right now, but I'll find us the way." Chavez then started to drink from the cup.

Steve snorted, "Oh, Christ, Chavez. That's all we need, some more of your red ass Navajo mambo-jahambo…we're running out of time, Chavez."

Chavez hissed at Steve, passing the cup.

"Is that any good?" Charlie asked Chavez. Billy drank from the cup and started coughing. He then handed it to me. I glanced over at Dick. He shook his head no, as to deter me from drinking from the cup. I quickly lifted the cup to my lips and drank, before Dick could do anything. When I was done, I stuck my tongue out at Dick, and suddenly began coughing, as Billy had done.

"Chavez, what is that stuff?" Charlie asked.

"Peyote." He answered.

"Oh, shit!" I muttered under my breath. I remember Chavez telling me about the sacred ritual involving peyote, and the hallucinogenic effect it has. I wonder if anyone else knew what it was.

After everyone drank from the cup, we all continued to sit around the fire. I wondered how soon the peyote would take effect.

What seemed a short time later, the confusion started. I watched the Regulators, as everything looked so abnormal. Dick kept on aiming his shotgun, as if to shoot, and then lowered it, not shooting. He looked confused, as if what he was going to shoot at was suddenly gone. I looked, but didn't see anything. Doc was sitting in the weeds, and talking about butterflies, flowers and Yen, Murphy's China doll.

Chavez was standing on a cliff, arms outstretched, not saying anything. I also saw Charlie standing near Chavez, muttering, "This is great!" He repeated this over and over again.

Getting up was difficult. I walked towards the grassy field, and heard Steve shout, "Did you see the size of that chicken!" He then shot the shotgun in the nearby cave. I looked, but did not see any chickens!

Reaching the field, I leaned against one of the trees, marveling in the beauty of nature. Everything looked so beautiful. I closed my eyes and smiled, wanting to stay here forever. Maybe I should pick some flowers!

I merrily skipped over to the field, and started gathering flowers. "Oh, it's so beautiful here, I don't wanna leave!"

"Why would you leave?" I heard Billy's voice behind me. Startled, I spun around, and almost fell over. Billy fell to the ground, laughing.

I started to giggle, and fell to the ground next to him, feeling dizzy. I couldn't stop laughing. "I don't think I could ever stop laughing." I said, as I looked over at Billy.

Suddenly, Billy stopped laughing. He looked over at me with a serious expression. "Your hair," He whispered, touching it. "It looks like…like… the mud at the bottom of the Pecos River."

The laughter died in my throat. I was wrong! I _did_ stop laughing. "_What_?" I hissed.

"No, no! Not in a bad way. When the light hits the river, with all the different colors, it's alive. It's pretty. It's just so pretty."

I found myself smiling again, at Billy's complement. I then remembered that I still had the flowers in my hand. I sat up and kneeled over Billy, and started to place them in the brim of his hat. He was quiet, and let me do it, smiling up at me. His blue eyes twinkled in the sunlight, and I couldn't help myself but to look into his eyes. They are so blue, it takes my breath away.

As I placed the last flower on the brim of his hat, Billy unexpectedly leans forward and gives me a quick kiss on the lips. He then jumps up, and runs off, hooting and laughing.

Did that just happen? I touched my lips and smiled. Is Billy not only the fastest gun in the west, but the fastest _kisser_ in the west? I began to laugh again, as I fell to the ground.

"**REGULATORS!**" I heard Chavez shout. "Mount up!"

Steve started to yell, as we all mounted our horses. I uncontrollably giggled again, as I witness Billy mount his horse, and he was sitting backwards in the saddle!

"Hey, Doc," Steve whispered. "Did you see the size of that chicken?" He then shot his shotgun once again.

"Godless heathens." I heard Dick mutter.

We rode through the reservation, Chavez leading us through. I didn't say anything as we rode through. Charlie was singing softly, as the Indians watched us ride by, rifles and other various weapons in their hands.

"Hey, Chavez, how come they ain't killing us?" Charlie wondered.

"Because we're in the Spirit world, asshole, they can't see us!" Steve laughed. I laughed quietly as we followed Chavez to safety, through and out of the Reservation, and into Blazer's Mill.


	4. Dick and Billy

**Chapter IV Dick and Billy**

**By tk421beth**

**_Okay...as of 12/28/05 I made some changes in this chapter. I had the year wrong on Jessie's journal entries. It needed to be changed!_**

**Chapter Summary: Arriving at Blazer's Mill, Dick has a heart-to-heart with Jessie that shocks her into silence! WARNING: Character death in this chapter (sniffs and sobs)**

**Author's Notes: **_What would I do without my Naomi? Sister-in-law, friend, beta, and my drinking partner! Thanks again! Also, kudos to Sue! Thanks for the suggestions!_

* * *

By the time we arrived at Blazer's Mill, we were all very hungry and very tired. It was decided that Steve would eat outside, to stand watch.

As we prepared to sit down for dinner, I chuckled a little bit, thinking how it was a wonder that Steve had shot a chicken, as we were coming into Blazer's Mill. Smiling, I remembered how on peyote, he kept on saying, 'Did you see the size of that chicken?'

It seemed I had a moment of free time, so I took out my diary and quickly began to write.

_January 1878_

_Dear Diary,_

_I don't know what day it is, but everything in my life has changed, and not for the better. Murphy's men killed Father as we were arriving back home from the New Year's party. I don't remember much after Father was killed, or the funeral. Doc told me that I was in shock, and that was to be expected._

"What you writing about, Jessie?" Charlie asked me.

"It's none of your business, Charlie." I answered him, causing him and Billy to laugh loudly. I looked over at Chavez, Dick and Doc. They were huddled together, talking.

_I've been staying with the Regulators since that terrible day, and it seems Billy is the only one who understands my need for revenge. He wants revenge too. Dick is upset that I am even involved, but there is nothing he can do about it now. _

"Jessica, come here, please." Dick asked me, interrupting my writing.

"Okay." I swiftly shut my diary, and place it in my vest pocket. I then walk over to Dick, who was in the parlor, as the other Regulators sat at the table, getting ready to eat.

"Yes?" I asked him.

Dick had his usual serious look on his face. He held my hands in his and looked into my eyes. "This has gone too far. I swore to John that I would protect you, Jessica."

I sighed, and looked to the floor, waiting for the usual speech from Dick. He's been muttering the same things to me over the past few days, how I should have stayed with Alex. I shouldn't even be here. I'm just a young girl…and so on.

"We're getting married and moving to Vermont." He blurted out.

For the first time in my life, I was shocked into silence. This was unexpected, for sure! I opened my mouth to say something, but to my surprise, nothing came out. So, I closed it again. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Billy, Charlie, Chavez and Doc look over at Dick and I with great interest, probably wondering what was going on.

"It's the only way, Jessica." Dick told me, his hands cupping my face, talking rapidly. I looked into his brown eyes, as he looked back at me with concern and worry. "The _only_ way I can protect you."

"Dick…what are you _saying_?" I asked him. His hands fell from my face and dropped to his sides. "Do you hear yourself? You sound _crazy_!" He sighed when I said that. "You're like a brother to me…I …I don't want to get married…oh, God!" I closed my eyes, my hands on my face, covering my eyes. _This was too much for me to handle_. _My heart hurt so much, with Father being ambushed…killed…and now this!_ "I can't do it." I defiantly told him. "You can't make me! I _won't_ do it." I stomped my foot on the floor in defiance.

"You _will_, Jessica. I _know_ what's stopping you." Dick was now scaring me, he was talking so fast! "It's not about revenge! It's about Billy, isn't it? I know you think you love him, but it's not love! He's no good for you! Billy's only going to get you into trouble and break you heart!" Dick then starts to pace. "_I'm_ what's good for you and _I'll_ take care of you. I promised John that I would. Now, end of discussion! Let's eat."

Dick walked briskly over to the table, before I could say anything about Billy, or what we just talked about. Dick has always been direct and forceful, but this was different! _What was going through Dick's mind? I didn't love Billy…I don't love anyone!_ I stood there for a moment before following. _Oh, God!_ _What the hell was this all about?_ I love Dick, but like a _brother_. I _don't_ want to marry him! I don't want to marry _anyone_!

I finally sat down, still in shock. Billy, who was seated across from me, raised his eyebrow at me, as if to ask what was going on. I also noticed Chavez, Charlie and Doc looking at me with the same expressions. I just shook my head, looked down at my plate, and sighed. I didn't want to say or do anything at this point of time.

Dick eyed me with a smile, and gave the blessing of the food. _It was like the conversation we just had never existed!_ "Lord, forgive us for our wrongdoings, for misguidance by heathen religions." He eyed Chavez when he said that. "Thank you for keeping us alive."

I stared at Billy, who picked up his fork.

"Lord," Dick went on. Billy sighed, and put his fork down. "Lord, be with us in doing the right thing."

Billy then grabbed his plate, ready to eat. I slowly smiled. I knew Dick wasn't done yet.

"Our Father, who art in Heaven," Billy snorted as Dick went on. "Hallow be thy name."

"Please, Dick. It's getting cold!" Billy pleaded.

Dick suddenly went for his gun, but Billy was much quicker. The both sat there, across from each other, guns pointed in each other's face. "I could've killed you, Dick, but I don't wanna to kill you. I wanna eat!"

"When we finish this meal, you little rodent, we're gonna go outside yard and see who has the right to run this group of Regulators." Dick glared at Billy.

"Richard, would you pass the gravy, please? And, please…KNOCK IT OFF!" Doc requested. I laughed nervously at that.

Steve suddenly came running in. "There's someone coming this way!" He announced.

"Just one?" Dick asked, lowering his gun from Billy, and looking outside the window. Billy lowered his gun and gave me a small grin.

Charlie looked out the window. "It's Buckshot Rogers."

"We got a warrant for him." Dick stated.

"Think he's come to surrender?" Doc laughed.

"Is he any good?" Billy wondered out loud.

"He's killed more people then smallpox." Charlie says fearfully.

"Well, hell!" Billy smiled, grabbing his shotgun. "Let's introduce ourselves."

I start to follow them out, but Dick grabs my wrist. "You're to stay in here." He commanded. "While I'm still alive, you will listen to me."

"The heck I will!" I yell, as I shake off his grip, and quickly follow Billy and Doc.

Standing outside, was a fat older man, with gray hair. At his side was a mule, loaded with supplies, and lots and lots of weapons.

"We've got a warrant for you, old man." Dick told him. I stood in between Dick and Billy, holding my shotgun loosely.

"You ain't got no business with that warrant no more, you son of a bitch." Roberts stated. "I'm on my own. I've come to pick up the $150 Sheriff Brady has put out each for the Kid and his sweetheart." Roberts looked at me, licking his lips. "The rest of you are only worth about $110, but I'll take it."

At this time, I didn't feel like arguing the point that I am _not_ Billy's sweetheart. I'm more concerned about staying alive.

"What a sweet disposition." Doc muttered.

Roberts just smiled. "Let's dance!" He shouted, shooting at us, as we scattered.

Dick suddenly grabs me by the waist, and tosses me like a rag roll behind a huge pile of wood. I narrowly missed falling on Billy. I would've liked to believe that Dick was putting me in a good position to shoot. "**You're to stay down!**" He commanded. I then knew differently.

Shots were fired from Roberts and the Regulators. I take stock of the situation, and notice Chavez was lying on the ground, slowly crawling toward us, his leg bleeding. Doc raises his gun, but it suddenly flies out of his hand. Doc yells, and ducks, blood pouring from him wounded hand. _This Buckshot Roberts is pretty good_.

While Billy is shooting wildly, I peek over the wood pile, my gun armed and ready. I saw Roberts walk into the outhouse, still firing at us.

"What the…! He just went into the outhouse!" I tell Dick. We all shoot at the outhouse.

We all hear a groan and a yell, and the sound of Roberts body fall to the ground.

"Hey, Billy," Dick tells him. "Why don't you go over there and cut the son of a bitch in half."

Billy looks at Dick like he's crazy.

"I'm daring you, Billy."

Billy smiled, then got up, and slowly started to walk away from the wood pile. Suddenly, a shot fires from the outhouse, barely missing Billy.

Billy scrambled back to safety. "To hell with that!" He tells Dick.

"Just do it, Billy! You're supposed to be the brave one! The newspapers all say it!"

"Brave, but not crazy!" Billy answers.

This bickering went back and forth for a little while. Before realizing what I was doing, I stood up. "I'll do it." I declare. Before they can stop me, I slowly creep away from the wood pile, shotgun in hand.

Just then, I hear a shot fire, and I feel a throbbing pain in my chest. I scream in shock, as I drop down to the ground on my back.

"**No!**" I heard someone shout, as I see Dick run out past me. I heard more yelling and shooting, then feel a hand grip the back of my shirt. _Oh, god, it hurts! Am I going to die?_ I howl out in pain, holding my chest with my left hand, and then realize that I am slowly being dragged back to safety. I gingerly grasp my shotgun with my free right hand.

"Are you all right?" Billy asked me, placing me against the wood. He looks down at me, his face full of worry. I don't say anything, surprised and pleased that Billy had the courage to drag me to safety under these circumstances. "Where are you hit?" Billy states, his hand now caressing my cheek. Chavez crawls over to me, also worried.

"I don't know…" I slowly said, and looked down at myself. "My chest…it hurts…" I tell him, still holding my left hand over my chest.

"You'll be all right, Bonita." Chavez tells me, holding my hand.

Billy glances down at my chest, and gently removes my hand, as Doc rushes over. Billy suddenly starts laughing like crazy. "She's fine! She's fine!" Billy shouts happily, as he reaches for my chest. _What is he doing?_ I feel a slight tug from my shirt, as he shows everyone his reason for joy. I glance up warily, and see what Billy has in his hand. It's my badge, the badge that Billy gave me…now bent and ruined from Buckshot's bullet. _That badge saved my life. Billy saved my life…again._

"Thank God!" Doc said.

"**No!**" Charlie screams. "**He got Dick!**"

"**NO!**" I scream. Forgetting my pain, I stand up, just to see Charlie and Steve shoot the outhouse like crazy. I gasp in horror, as I see Dick fall on the ground.

"Jessie, no!" Billy orders, as I hurry over to Dick. I kneel down beside him. I could feel the tears swell up, but not fall. _Never will they fall again._

"Dick, oh, God! No." I sob, as Dick looks up at me. He reaches for my hand.

"Jessica," He says. "Thank God you're all right." Dick gives me a small smile. "I have to tell you…" He winces from the pain.

"Dick, no, don't talk. It'll be okay." I sooth him, gently caressing his face, his hair. "You'll be fine, see? Look! I'm okay. See, Dick? I'm okay."

"No, Jessica, listen. I have to tell you, I always wanted to tell you. On your birthday, you looked so beautiful… so beautiful. I had to tell you…" He pauses, as he coughs up blood.

"No, Dick, oh God! No…not again! Please, Dick..." I plead to no one in particular. "I'll marry you and go to Vermont! I swear I will!" Dick smiles at me as I say this, as I look into his brown eyes. "Please, Dick! Don't leave me!" I beg.

"Jessica," Dick whispers. "I love you. I have always loved you." He then releases my hand, and let's out his last breath.

"**Nooooo!**" I stand up shrieking, my hands clenched into fits, so tight that I draw blood. My eyes are blurry, as I notice my shotgun lying next to Dick's dead body.

_Dick's dead body._ Everything goes black, except for my shotgun. I pick it up and slowly walk over towards the outhouse.

The outhouse door suddenly flings open. There is Buckshot Roberts, smiling at me. He aims his six-shooter, and starts to shoot wildly at me.

I feel invincible, as Roberts bullets fly past me. Not one had touched me. _I will not die today. I have a purpose._ I take a final stance, and aim for his head, as more of his bullets fly past me. I pull the trigger, and it's done.

I fall back to the ground, on my knees, feeling weak and tired. I look at Dick, and feel the tears swell up once again. _Dick is dead_. Oh God! He's dead! It's _my_ fault he's dead!

"Great guns of Blazer's Mill!" Charlie yells panicking. "Dick is dead and he's our foreman! He's dead!"

"We gotta get out of here. Murphy's men will be crawling all around here!" Doc shouts.

"**Regulators!**" Billy yells. "Mount up!"

I can't move. He loves me. No, he _loved_ me. I never knew. _What have I done_?

"Bonita." Chavez comes over. "We have to go, now."

"Dick, oh Dick." I sob, touching his face, wishing he'd just wake up. It looked like he was sleeping. "We can't leave him!" I insist. "Not…not…like…this." I stutter.

"No. We leave now. We have to leave him, Bonita. His spirit is no longer here anyway." Chavez calmly tells me, as he helps me up, and walks me over to our horses.

I mount my horse and glance back at Dick, lying on the ground. Blinking back my tears, I put away my shotgun. I glance over at Billy, who avoids meeting my gaze. We all ride away in silence.

* * *

Much later, we begin setting up camp in the nearby mountains. Doc told us all earlier that he needs to go into the nearest town, to send a telegraph to Dick's mother in Vermont, and also needs to get fresh wraps for his wounded hand. Doc decides that it would be much safer if I stayed here with Billy, Charlie, Chavez and Steve.

I sit on the ground, watching Billy start to work on one of his guns. I start a small campfire, wondering what we were going to do now.

"What areya doing there, Billy?" Steve asks, filling his mouth full of tobacco.

Billy explains to Steve that he is cutting down the sight of his gun, so he can get an eight of a drop on Sheriff Brady. I stare at Billy, as he holsters his gun away. Billy then quickly reaches for it again, and shoots towards Chavez, who is standing on a large rock, looking down. The shot doesn't even faze Chavez.

"Billy, we can't touch the Sheriff." Charlie tells him. "Dick said so."

"Well, Dick ain't around anymore is he? Right now, Sheriff Brady is in _desperate_ need of being removed from office."

Chavez glances over at us. "We're not going after Brady. No Murphy men, no more." He calmly states.

"Murphy's taking inventory in Tunstall's store right now and you're saying it means nothing to you?" Billy questions.

"It means nothing to me?" Chavez glares at Billy. "Murphy and his politicians have taken more blood from me than they ever will from you."

"How do you figure?" Billy presses.

"The Red Sands Creek Reservation, my mother's people. You see, Murphy was under government contract to supply us with beef, but two winters ago, he sent only rotten meat. No corn, no flour, just rancid beef crawling with worms."

I sighed, and stood up, as Chavez continues to tell his story. Wiping the weariness from my face with my hand, I walked away, not wanting to hear it again. Chavez had told me all about his people and how they were forced to live on reservations, how they were murdered. He truly _is_ the last of his people.

Standing there alone, I thought of Dick. Tears swelled in my eyes once again. Dick said he loved me. _Oh, God_! _Why didn't he say anything before?_ _Why_? I stood there, agonizing over the fact that I am relived that it was Dick who was killed, and not Billy. _It could have been Billy. It was Dick, but it could have been Billy! _I moan in anguish, as I close my eyes. _I'm a bad person._ _Dick was a good man…no, a great man. He wanted to protect me, even wanted to marry me. _My hands on my face, I cry out in pain, for the loss of my Father, and now Dick.

Shaking with tightly contained emotion, I make my way back towards camp.

I make it back to see Chavez standing in front of his horse. "I guess you don't know the meaning of the word pals." Billy tells Chavez. _What was going on? Was Chavez leaving? _

"Hey, Jess." Billy walks over to me. "Let's scout out and search the area, before it gets too dark, okay?"

I nodded, and mounted my horse. Charlie and Steve were cooking over the campfire. Chavez sighed, and sat down with them. I then look up into the sky. "Looks like rain." I comment. "Might not be a good idea to scout now, Billy."

He snorted, and then smiled at me. The first smile since we left Blazer's Mill. "C'mon, Jess! Last one up on the cliff is a three legged bull!"

Giving in, I grin ruefully, as I follow Billy up the cliff. It looked like we're going to be camping here for a few days, at least, until Doc comes back..._if_ he comes back.


	5. Thunder and Lighting

**Chapter V Thunder and Lighting**

**By: tk421beth**

**Chapter Summary: Jessie and Billy are scouting the area, when they suddenly get caught in a crazy thunderstorm! They head for shelter and wait for it to pass, but it looks like the storm will last throughout the night…**

Billy and I rode in silence, scouting around the area where we set up camp. We didn't see anything, and it looked like staying here would be okay for a few days. I thought about Doc, and feverishly hoped that he was all right. I have a feeling that he went to go see Yen…Murphy's china doll, but Doc would be foolish to go back to Lincoln now!

"Jessie!" Billy rode up next to me, interrupting my thoughts. "Let's check that cave out." He pointed at a small mountain. "Anyone can easily hide in there."

I nodded, and followed Billy up the mountain. The sky was growing dark, I noticed, looking towards the west. Black clouds swirled overhead, and a slight wind started to blow. Twilight was upon us, and what looked like a _heck_ of a storm. _I've always been afraid of thunder and lighting._

All of a sudden, the thunder rumbled overhead. I looked up again to see lighting streak in the sky. My horse whinnied, as she nervously followed Billy's horse up the mountain. "It's okay, girl." I soothed her, patting her neck. _I hoped it was okay!_

The rain began to fall, big, huge drops from the sky. More lighting and thunder quickly followed. I shuddered in fear, but rode on. The rain quickly got more violent, and by the time we made it to the cave, both of us were soaked to the skin. We both hurriedly dismounted and rushed inside the cave with our horses.

"I guess you were right, Jessie." Billy laughed, as I tied our horses to some of the small shrubbery that was growing just inside the cave. "It's going to be some _hell_ of a storm!"

The cave was pretty big, and it looked like no one had been here in a while. I anxiously looked around, but could see nothing. It was _very_ dark, the deeper you walked into the cave. I hoped no rattlers were resting here!

"Scared?" Billy teased, sensing my fear.

"No!" I shouted, as a roar of thunder startled me, sending me three feet in the air, drawing a shriek out of my mouth.

I could see Billy smile at me, as the lighting streaked through the sky, lighting the cave for a moment. "No, huh?" He chuckled, as he took off his jacket, and started to unbutton his shirt. "And geese don't fly south for the winter!" He made it a statement, not a question.

"What are you _doing_?" I demanded, my eyes widening in question.

"I'm soaked, Jess, and so are you. We need to get out of these wet clothes." He quietly explained.

I gulped, and quickly started to gatherer kindling. I was freezing with cold, but I didn't complain. There was _no_ way I was going to get undressed here! I busied myself in starting a small campfire. I could hear the rain get louder and louder, with even more thunder and lighting. We seemed to be right in the middle of this crazy thunderstorm, and I hoped Charlie, Chavez and Steve were okay.

Smiling at the success of my campfire, I walked over to my horse, and to my dismay, all my clothes were drenched! "**Bloody hell!**"

"What?" Billy asked, walking up behind me.

"My clothes," I exclaimed, quickly going through my saddle bags. "They're sopping wet!" I turned around to face Billy. I gasped, for Billy had taken off his shirt, and peeled down his long johns over his trousers. I have never seen any man bare-chested, not even my own Father! My eyes lingered for a moment, as Billy stared back at me, and started to beam. I could feel my face flush, and quickly turned away. "My blanket, and…b-bed roll are…" Billy was now at my side, standing very close. _It was like he knew that he was making me feel uncomfortable, and he was enjoying it!_ "Are…are…s-soaked also." I stuttered, much to my mortification.

Billy started to check his bags. "I have two dry blankets… and my bed roll." He told me, continuing to check his belongings. "No dry clothes, though, damnit!"

_Oh God!_ I open my mouth to say something, and then suddenly sneezed. I saw Billy open his mouth to say 'Bless you' when I sneezed again, and then again!

"Shit, Jessie, we need to get you out of these clothes_, pronto_!"

I looked at him in alarm. "No, I'm fine!" I told him, trying to smile, wiping the wetness from my face with the sleeve of my shirt. I felt my teeth start to chatter with cold. I knew Billy was right, but I _couldn't_!

"That's stupid! Course you're going to have to change your clothes! If you get sick, I'll have to leave you here, do you want that?"

"No." I whispered.

Billy touched my arm, and gasped in surprise. "You're _freezing_! Jesus Christ, Jessie! Get undressed _now_, you hear me?" He commanded. Billy rustled through his saddlebags, and handed me one of his blankets.

I just stood there dumbly, holding Billy's blanket.

"**Shit, Jessie. Do as I say!**" He barked at me.

Gulping, I headed towards our horses and undressed between them. My fingers shook with cold, as I unbuttoned my shirt, and pants. I glanced over at Billy, whose back was to me and I could see he was now taking off his trousers. Blushing, I quickly looked away, and hurriedly took off the rest of my clothes, and threw the blanket over me.

I sneaked another look, and saw Billy sitting at the campfire, his blanket around him. The rain continued to fall, bringing the thunder and lighting with it. I knew we would have to stay here for a _long_ while.

Billy then glanced over at me. "That a girl! I knew you'd see reason! Now, all you have to do is lay your clothes on that rock, next to mine. We'll just wait for them to dry." He indicated a large rock that was close to the campfire.

I slowly did has he commanded. After I was done, I sat on the ground across from Billy, clutching the blanket around me. I was wearing _nothing_! Not even my boots! I felt more vulnerable than a newborn kitten, with its mama gone to feed.

I notice Billy pull something out from under his blanket. Oh, it's a bottle of whiskey! The only time I ever drank was about a year ago, when Father was gone for a week, and it was just me and the kids from the nearby ranch. Dick who was left in charge of me, was mad as hell, but never told my Father about that time.

What was strange about the whole thing is that I did not get sick. The other kids were acting very silly and throwing up all night. I drank as much whiskey as they did, but it didn't affect me as it did them. _This shall be interesting, indeed! _I smile at Billy, wondering what happens when _he_ drinks alcohol!

Shivering from the cold, I see Billy take a long swig and then hand the bottle to me.

"Here you go, Jessie. This will keep you warm." He hands me the bottle.

I grasp the bottle with a shaking hand, and take it from him. I hesitantly sniff the bottle, for show, and look at him.

"Ah, come on, Jessie! It ain't _that_ bad! It's time now for you to prove yourself a man!" Billy dares.

I shoot Billy a dirty look, and take a healthy swig, longer than Billy's, I made sure. I hoped it would warm me up in a hurry!

He looks at me in shock, when I pass him back the bottle. I did not gag, nor make a face after I drank the whiskey. Two things he more likely thought I would do.

We take turns drinking the whiskey. As in the past, the alcohol does not affect me one bit.

"Where'd you get that ring?" Billy asked, pointing at the ring on my right hand. "Did your sweetheart give that to you?" He laughed.

"I don't have a sweetheart!" I insisted, glaring at him.

"Oh, yes you do!" Billy continued to tease. "The newspapers say so!"

I give him a dirty look, as he laughs. "Let me see it."

I made sure the blanket was tightly around me, got up and walked over to Billy and sat next to him.

Billy gently reaches for my right hand, to study my ring. I feel warmth spread up my arm when he touches my hand. _What was it about him? Why do I feel this way?_ The whiskey doesn't alter his speech or actions that much. He is definitely _not_ intoxicated. Perhaps Billy is _also_ alcohol tolerant!

"That's a pretty ring, Jessie." Billy told me, inspecting my ring closely, still holding my hand. "JMT…what's you middle name?"

"Michelle. My Father gave me that ring on my birthday…before…b-before he was…" I couldn't say _murdered_. I just couldn't say it out loud. The recent killings of Father and Dick were all of a sudden _too_ much for me to bear. My lower lip trembled, as a sob rose from my throat. Hot tears threatened to spill from my eyes. My free hand flew to my mouth, as I was trying like mad to keep from crying.

Billy didn't say a word, didn't have to. He pulls me towards him, and holds me in his arms, as I cry on his shoulder. _Never would I cry again. Never. _

But…it feels good to cry. I wept for my Father, Dick and what my life is going to be like from now on. _I'm wanted. I'm worth $150 dead. Murphy's men and bounty hunters are after me, wanting me dead. Hell, they're after all the Regulators, too. What will I do now? My parents are deceased. Dick is dead. I have the Regulators, but in all actuality, I have no one. _

Billy held me close, one hand caressing my hair, the other holding me by my waist. "Jess, don't worry. You have me. I'll take care of you." He whispered into my ear.

I sighed, wondering how, once again, Billy can read my thoughts.

I sat there wrapped in Billy's embrace, my face pressed deep in the bare flesh of his neck and shoulder. As I breathed in his musky scent, I felt secure for the first time in weeks. My surroundings melted away, I was no longer aware of the fire burning; the cold stone walls that surrounded us, or the strong embrace of the man that held me. I seemed to be floating in space. I felt myself slipping deeper into darkness. Thinking to myself, how much easier it would be to just let go. Like a lifeline, Billy's soft words in my ear brought me back to reality.

"Jessie, sweetheart, you have to be strong, for yourself, and for me. We'll be strong for each other."

He lifted my chin up with his fingers, and looked deep into my eyes, as his lips pressed softly against mine. I could feel a heat starting to burn from deep in my chest, as our kiss deepened. The only thought that raced through my mind is that I_ needed _him. _I need to feel alive. I need to feel something other than the pain_. I could tell he desired me by the way he held me. We gave into our passions and became one.

* * *

I awoke the next morning to find the fire we lit the night before, like our passion, were merely embers now. Snuggled up to Billy for warmth, it was hard to put my feelings in perspective. I felt like I reached a threshold in my life. The last of my innocence was now gone. _Was I now a woman?_ It all seemed like it really didn't matter. My night with Billy made me realize I had to set different priorities now. What did I want from my life? What did the future hold for me? Do I even have a future? It all seemed meaningless. Billy's arm was still around me when I got up. I stood there naked, not caring about the childish inhibitions I had the night before. I quickly dressed and woke Billy. "We better get back. The others will be worried." 

Billy awoke and propped his head up with his arm. His blue eyes looked at me quizzically. "Are you okay?"

I look down at him and smile. "As okay as any girl would be in my position." Without another word, I saddled our horses and packed all our provisions while Billy dressed himself.

Before we arrived at camp, I glance over at Billy. "Thank you."

Billy stares at me with a perplexed look on his face. "For what?"

I just smile and ride ahead of Billy into camp.

* * *

As we arrive, I see Charlie, Chavez and Steve where we left them yesterday, and upon seeing us, they look relieved. 

"Where the hell were you both?" Charlie demands, as Billy dismounts. "Jesus Christ! We were worried!"

"We got caught in the thunderstorm." Billy calmly tells him. "We found shelter, and had to stay there."

I too, dismount, and wince in pain as I do so. _I had no idea that I would be so sore_.

"Are you okay, Bonita?" Chavez asks.

"I'm fine." I look up at Chavez, to see him staring into my eyes. _He knows. Chavez knows! _

"Your Father would not approve." He simply states.

"Bloody hell, Chavez! My Father's dead and buried! I _don't_ need another one!" I snap at him.

Chavez just stands there, taken aback at my outburst.

Normally, I would feel guilty for what I said to Chavez…but that was the _old_ Jessica. I no longer felt like a child, therefore, I would no longer accept being treated as one.

Everyone's attention is drawn to the sound of an approaching rider. I see Billy's hand instantly go for his six-shooter. Without thinking, I realize that I'm holding my shotgun, my finger on the trigger. I breathe a sigh of relief and relax a bit, as I realize its Doc. He waves at us, with his wounded hand in fresh wraps. _Doc's all right. Thank God!_ I smile over a Doc, my heart swelling with happiness as he grins back at me. _Maybe this is where the pain begins not to hurt so badly._

Doc dismounts, and gives me a big hug. _Everything has changed…but it was so good to have Doc back!_

"Regulators!" I hear Billy shout. "Let's ride!"

"Sheriff Brady," I whisper to myself, mounting my horse. "The Ides of March are upon you. It's now time for your reckoning."

**Author's Note: This chapter was extremely difficult to write! Many thanks to: Naomi, Sue and my husband Tom! **


	6. Reckoning

**Chapter VI Reckoning **

**By: tk421beth**

**_Chapter Summary:_ _Jessie and the Regulators arrive back into Lincoln to take care of some…business!_**

_**This chapter is dedicated to a loyal fan...JosieAndThePussycats…! This chapter is for you, Jo! Thanks for the reviews! hugs!**_

_**To MindReadingCoconuts06: I haven't forgotten you…Chapter VII will be for you!**_

It was early afternoon when we arrived in the outskirts of Lincoln. The monsoon season was upon us, and I could see a storm was brewing on the horizon. The air was crisp with the slight sent of rain. Riding next to Billy the whole way, I was quiet, and just listened to the Regulators talk.

Doc rode up alongside Billy and I. "Jessica," he said to get my attention, but I could tell he was addressing us both. "I think it would be in your best interest for you to be on the roof of Murphy's store with me."

Before I could answer, Billy looked over at Doc and nodded in agreement. "I think that's a good idea, Doc. When the shooting starts, who knows which way the lead's gonna fly?"

Detecting a protective tone in Billy's voice, I glared at him and Doc. "I appreciate the concern that you both have for me, but before you make decisions regarding my _best interest_, I would recommend that you _both_ consult me first." I kicked my heels, spurring my horse to run ahead the rest of the party.

As I rode away, I could hear Billy laugh. "Damn, Doc! I'll be _damned_ if that girl don't have a fire in her gut."

As we covered the last mile or so into Lincoln, the sky was getting darker and the wind was starting to pick up. It seemed the weather mirrored the mood of all of us. The arrangement was to stable the horses behind Father's store. From there we would split up and set the trap for our prey, Sheriff Brady. I ran over the plan several times in my mind. Like a well orchestrated symphony, it went off without a hitch in my head. Father used to say, _'There's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip'._ I thought, maybe Doc _is_ right. Maybe I would be better off with him, on the roof of Murphy's store. If the plan _did_ go awry, and that slippery bastard tried to skin out, we could blow a hole in his back from our vantage point.

* * *

I was in position on the roof of Murphy's store with Doc. I began to make sure that my shotgun and six shooters were ready to go. I glanced down at Father's store, and remembered the good times Father and I had there. A million memories flooded my mind of Father and me laughing and telling jokes as we stocked the store for the first time. _How I missed Father!_

"Christ, Jessica!" Doc suddenly blurted out, interrupting my thoughts.

"What?" I turned to look at him, warm memories now gone.

"You know what. You and Billy…Goddamnit! What the _hell _were you thinking?"

"If you were so bloody worried about me, why didn't you take me with you? I _know_ you went to see Yen! Don't deny it!" I stared angrily at him.

Doc was taken aback for a moment. "Jessica…for God's sake, you were supposed to marry Richard!"

I sighed and closed my eyes. "Doc…why didn't you tell me?" I spoke softly, remembering Dick's overly protective nature. _Too many memories…too many emotions new and raw…_

Doc sighed, and softly touched my cheek. "He didn't want you to know…yet. It was all worked out with your Father. John approved of the marriage."

"Shit, but _I_ didn't approve of it." I pushed his hand away from my face. "No one asked _me_, Doc!" I sighed. "I will no longer tolerate being treated like a child no more, Doc."

Doc didn't say anything for a moment; he just stared at me, those sharp blue eyes studying me. "God, look at you! You're glowing for fuck's sake! You _love_ Billy, don't you? Jesus Christ! Richard was right! Oh, God, he was right!"

I was silent. I could feel my face flush, so I turned away from him. I didn't know _exactly_ how I felt about Billy, but what I did know is that we shared the same need about killing the men that murdered my Father. _That's all I needed_. I look down at the street and could see Sheriff Brady walking with a few of his men, Pippin, Hindman and Long. They were all armed, and Brady was holding his rifle. "There he is!" I whispered with excitement, even though I knew no one but Doc could hear me. I picked up my shotgun, which is armed and ready, as Doc also looks down at the street. "There's Billy!"

I see Billy skipping behind Brady. _Skipping…Billy the Kid skipping? _I smile, and almost giggle out loud.

Brady stopped walking for a moment, as if he sensed if someone was behind him. Billy quickly grabbed his own hat, and threw it over Brady's head. I watched with baited breath as Billy's hat landed in front of Sheriff Brady.

"What the _hell_ is he doing?" Doc wonders out loud, crouching down beside me, his buffalo rifle ready.

I watch as Billy suddenly grabs Brady's six shooters right out of his holsters, surprising Brady and the men with him. "Top o' the morning to you, girls!" Billy greets them, laughing, aiming one of the guns right in Brady's face.

The color of the Sheriff's face rapidly turned ashen while Pippin, Hindman and Long look confused and stunned.

It's starting to rain, a light rain. Thunder rolls above us, warning that a big storm is brewing. _I am no longer afraid of thunder and lighting. _My eyes are set on the Sheriff, wondering what was going to happen next.

I spot Hindman reaching for his gun, and I quickly took aim and shoot him square in the chest. He falls to the ground, dead. That caused all hell to break loose.

"Good shot!" Doc exclaims, as I reload my shotgun.

Everyone started shooting all at the same time. Shouts ring out from the innocent locals who happen to be out at this particular time. They all run away, screaming in terror. Quite a few of Murphy's men as well as the rest of the Sheriff's posse run out into the street, probably wondering what the hell was going on. Doc and I are ready, shooting various Murphy men and the Sheriff's posse as well. I make sure to shoot anyone that even got close to Billy. I see Chavez ride in, shouting an Indian war cry, throwing his knife into one of Murphy's men throat.

Lighting streaks across the sky, as the rain falls heavy. It's very dark, almost like night, even though it's only early afternoon. A shot fires in our direction, which barely misses Doc. I scowl, as Doc and I shoot towards where the shot was fired from the street. Charlie and Steve are shooting wildly from their position, managing to shoot many of Brady's and Murphy's men.

After a short time, all of Murphy's men and the Sheriff's Posse who are still alive all retreat. _We have won this round_. Doc and I carefully climb down the roof of Murphy's store, and gather all of our horses. It's pouring rain now, the thunder deafening.

Sheriff Brady is attempting to crawl away from the scene, hence being shot quite a few times. He tries to take hold of his rifle, which is lying next to him. Billy steps on his hand, and points Brady's pistol in his face. The Sheriff lay on the ground, helplessly looking up at Billy. I observe blood pour from a wound in Billy's thigh, and gasp in shock. _Who in the hell shot Billy?_

Billy's lips move, but I could not hear what he was saying, over the downpour and the crack of thunder. I hold my breath as he pulls the trigger and ends Brady's miserable existence. I was supposed to feel closure, but I feel nothing. This man had a huge part in my Father's murder. _What is wrong with me? Why don't I feel joy…content?_ It all seems senseless to me, but there must be accountability. Those who had a hand in my Father's demise _will pay_. "They who sow the wind shall reap the whirlwind." I proclaim, grabbing the reins of my horse, and Billy's.

Doc turns to look at me, his hand on my shoulder. "Your Father used to say that."

"I know, Doc. I know."

* * *

I give Billy a smile, as he stands, waiting patiently for his photograph to be taken. The photographer, a tiny mousy man with a New York accent, seems nervous, telling Billy it will be only a few minutes more, as he still is setting his equipment up. My eyes follow the little man rushing around his store, as I lean against the wall, wishing he would hurry up. 

We're in Fort Sumner, but on our way to go see Alex and Susan. _I'm dreading that reunion, because there's no way I can make Alex and Susan understand what needs to be done; No amount of persuading will ever change their minds._

I mended Billy's leg, and amazed myself as well as the Regulators how well I did, with such few medical provisions we had. Doc was particularly amazed at my new ability. Doc had studied to be a physician before coming to Lincoln, and commented that I had the skill to be an exceptional doctor of medicine.

"Hey, Jessie, come be in the picture with me!"

I laugh at that, shaking my head no. "Maybe next time."

"You should do so, miss." The photographer tells me, with a smile. He's standing behind the huge camera, almost ready, it seems. "You have such a beautiful face!"

"She is pretty, ain't she?" Billy agrees. "Did you know that she's the Sweetheart Shooter?"

The photographer looks at me with unease, his mouth open in shock. I grunt in irritation, as Billy full well knows I hate the name _The Independent_ bestowed on me. The photographer tells Billy that everything's ready.

_Pop!_ A flash and some smoke, and he's done, the picture _finally _taken. The little man rushes about, taking all the steps to make Billy's image appear on tin type.

"C'mon, sweetheart, get your picture taken!" Billy insists. "I'll pay for it."

"Oh, what the bloody hell, all right." I give in. "How do I look?" I'm standing in front of him. My face is dirty; my clothes are mud-caked and wrinkled. I knew I must look appalling.

Billy chuckles, and gives me a kiss, his arms around my waist, bending me over backwards as we kiss. I try to squirm away from him, laughing, but he holds me tight, now kissing my neck.

"I can't wait until we're alone again." He whispers, his blue eyes twinkling with delight.

"Billy!" I gasp in surprise, as he laughs. "She's ready!" He announces.

A few moments later, and I'm sitting on a wooden chair, my beloved shotgun laid on my lap. I managed to wipe off most of the dirt that was on my face, and dusted off my clothes a little bit.

"I'm almost ready!" The photographer smiles at me.

"Christ, sweetheart, you look beautiful!" Billy encourages me, standing behind the photographer.

I give him a wide smile as I hear a _Pop! _A flash and some smoke and I'm done.

We walk out together, Billy holding my tin type photo. "Too bad we can't see your green eyes, Jess." He pockets my picture in his shirt.

"Hey, that's mine!"

"I paid for it, it's mine, and. I'll never let it go."

"Then I want yours."

"I was planning to give it to somebody else."

"To whom?" I wonder, trying to ignore the pang of jealously.

He just smiles at me.

* * *

"It's for you, Alex." Billy tries to hand Alex his photograph. 

We arrived at the McSween's residence a few moments ago. We're all standing outside with Alex. He looks ill…pale and sweaty and he's wrapped up in a blanket, even though it's warm outside. I wonder about his asthma…is that why he's so ill? Alex looks at Billy angrily. "You weren't supposed to touch the Sheriff, Billy."

"It was a good move for us, Alex."

"Was it? Have you read the paper?" He questions, shoving the paper at Billy.

All of a sudden, Susan comes bursting out of the house and upon seeing me, rushes over and gives me a big hug. I return it, happy to see her. "Come inside, dear." She tells me, putting her arm around my shoulder, and steering me into the house.

I sit at the kitchen table, as Susan brings out lemonade and glasses. "Alex doesn't look well." I say, as she hands me a glass of lemonade.

"Jessica," Susan ignores my statement, and takes my hand in hers. "We're so worried about you. Why did you do it? Why didn't you come back here?"

I glance out the window. I can see Alex rant and rave, his arms in the air, as Billy just stares at him. I then look back at Susan. She is the only mother figure I have ever had, but I know that she will never understand the path that I have chosen. "Revenge, Susan, for my Father."

"There are other ways, Jessica."

"No, there is not!" I shout, standing up, looking down at her. "Not when Murphy is still alive, there _is_ _no other way_. The Santa Fe ring needs to be broken up. I will kill as many Murphy men that I can in order to **stop it**!" My fist pounds on the kitchen table.

Susan's hand flies to her mouth, as she cries out in disbelief. "Can you hear yourself, Jessica? This doesn't sound like you at all! Your Father wouldn't want you to do this!"

"Bloody hell, Susan, my Father is dead! I need to do _something_! No one else is doing anything about Murphy." _No one else but Billy._

Susan shakes her head in doubt. "You've changed." She whispers, staring at me with a stunned expression. "They were supposed to expose the Ring, but you all went on a rampage!"

I snort, and down the rest lemonade in one gulp. "Yes, I have changed, Susan. Death does that to people."

"You're not the only person who has lost a Father, Jessica."

"Yes, I know. But I have to do this, don't you realize? **I've lost everything! I have no one!**" I take a deep breath. _Calm down…I have Billy, though. Billy told me he'd look after me. I also had Doc, Chavez, Charlie and Steve. _"There are certain priorities that I know I need to deal with, but I must finish what I started."

"Jessica…you and the boys are now wanted by the law as well as outside the law. Richard's dead…what happened?"

I shake my head. I didn't want to think about Dick. "I'm sorry. I can't talk about that right now." I say, quickly turning away from the table and walking outside. I hear Susan follow close behind.

I stand next to Billy, and he puts his arm around my waist, as if reassuring me. I glance over at Alex, to see what he thinks of Billy's boldness. Alex stares at Billy and me, and I can see the disappointment on his face. At first, I feel my temper rising in me. _How dare Alex cast judgment on me and the only man that would help me in my plight_? I bite my lower lip and look Alex in the eye. "Alex, if you don't understand what Billy and I and the rest of the Regulators are doing, there is no way I can explain it to you."

I can see a tear well up in Alex's eye. He places his hand on my shoulder. "Jessica, you must be careful not to fall into the same trap as Murphy and his men. Remember what the scripture says…Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord."

With that, Billy pushes Alex's hand off my shoulder. "The Lord can have vengeance. We want Murphy's ass."

Susan walks up to Billy and I. "Please take Jessica to old Mexico, Billy." She pleads, as she looks at all of us, with tears in her eyes. "You _all_ need to go to old Mexico. Please…we care about you all."

Billy hands her his photograph. She takes it and gives him a small smile. I reach out and hug Susan goodbye. My eyes water for a moment as she hugs me back. I then mount my mare and ride away with the Regulators.

**Author's Note:**

**_Hope you liked it! Please remember to review! Thanks! As Always, special thanks to Tom and Sue! Naomi is A.W.O.L. at this time!_**


	7. Bar Help

**Chapter VII Bar Help**

_**Promises and Dreams**_

**By: tk421beth**

**Here I go again! Just updated this chapter as of 12/28/05 because Jessie's journal date entries were incorrect!**

**_Chapter Summary: Jessie and the Regulators have fled Lincoln after Billy kills Sheriff Brady. _**

_**This Chapter is dedicated to MindReadingCoconuts06! Thanks for your reviews! (Hugs)**_

* * *

The sun was shining, with no sign of rain in sight as we headed towards Fort Sumner. We rode for a few hours before stopping for a rest. I notice Steve and Charlie huddled together in a hushed discussion with Doc and Chavez. _What are they talking about?_

Billy walks up to me, and takes my hand. Without a word, he leads me a short distance away from the others under a huge cedar tree.

"Sweetheart, I have to tell you…what we have is special. I know you feel it too...don't doubt what you feel." Billy whispers, as he takes my face in his hands, and slowly moves his lips closer to mine, kissing me. I kiss him back, feeling giddy with anticipation, as his arms are now around me, pulling me even closer to him. _This feels so good…I don't want to stop. _I groan with pleasure as we kiss slowly and passionately, letting it linger.

"Ahem!"

We slowly break apart to see Steve standing there, looking uncomfortable. "Billy, could I talk to ya? It's Charlie. You better come see him."

We walk over to Charlie, who is standing with Chavez and Doc. He looks pale and uneasy. "Steve told me, 'bout what they're saying in the paper, Billy." He stammers.

Billy raises an eyebrow in question.

"What are they saying?" I ask.

"Steve told us the new Sheriff…Peppin…is planning a party for us." Doc answers.

"What party?" I inquire.

"He means the hangin'." Billy explains to me with a grin.

Charlie walks up to Billy. "Shit! Have you ever seen a man hang, Billy?"

"Yup! Seen Red Smitty hang…his head came clean off! What a sight that-"

"Billy," Doc interrupts. "I don't think Charlie wants to hear about Smitty. I think he wants to _hear_ that we're _not_ going to hang."

"They say ya mess yourself!" Charlie looks over at me, his face red with embarrassment. "Girls watchin' and everything!"

"If we get caught, we're gonna hang." Billy calmly tells Charlie. "But there's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip."

I look over at Billy in surprise. _That's what Father used to say._

"I gotta do something...before they catch us. You gotta let me do it." Charlie pleads with Billy…with all of us.

I almost grin, full well knowing what Charlie wanted to do.

* * *

We arrive at Fort Sumner. The villagers all surrounded us, chanting happily _El Chavito! El Chivato! _Billy shook a few of their hands with a huge smile on his face. I dismounted my horse, and a young lad suddenly appeared by my side and took my mare to stable her. I notice Chavez and Doc have amazed expressions on their faces, at the way the people were crowding around Billy. I watch Billy with a smile on my face as a few old women crowded around him, blessing him, while some the young girls giggled and batted their eyes at him.

_Sweetheart Shooter! Sweetheart Shooter! _The locals started to chant along with _El Chivato! El Chivato! _I grimace, silently cursing _The Independent_ that damned newspaper, whom titled me with a name I can't stand. Billy notices my fury and laughs, finally dismounting his horse.

We all give Charlie some money, and leave him outside as the rest of us head inside the saloon. Before following Billy and the others, I stand outside and watch Charlie pocket the money and walk slowly towards the brothel. I smile and then enter the saloon.

It's not _too_ busy in here, I notice as I glance around the small establishment. A man is playing the banjo near the door, and there are a few men playing cards. Billy, Chavez, Doc and Steve are sitting at one of the available tables. Chavez got up to order some drinks. "I'll get this round." I tell him, walking up to the bar. A tall, well-dressed man and a local gal are the only two people at the bar.

"-If this Billy the Kid is in town, he's two hundred dollars dead." I hear the man tell the local whore. I raise an eyebrow to that. _Who the hell is this?_ I try not to laugh out loud. I glance back at the table. Billy gives me a big grin; obviously he has not heard what this tall man said. _And if he did…he would be dead._

The whore laughs at the man, as I signal the bartender. "You can't catch Billito," She tells him, leaning close to him, her chest on his arm. "But…perhaps a strong, big Texas man like yourself can…"

I lean up against the bar, as the bartender comes over to take my order. "Hello, I need five whis-"

"Well, Hel-_lo_ there!" The tall man interrupts me. I slowly look over, to see him smile down at me. He has long brown hair, complete with mustache, and a slight beard. "Texas Joe Grant at your service." He says, offering his hand to me.

I ignore him, and order the five whiskies. The bartender turns away as he fills my order.

Grant unexpectedly grips my shoulders and spins me around with ease. His fingers grip me possessively, as he clears his throat. "Well, little lady…rudeness like what you just displayed is _not_ tolerated by the bar help…no matter _how_ pretty they are." I can see the desire in his features, as his eyes leisurely roam my body.

I glare at him, with my mouth open wide. _This idiot thinks I'm a whore?_ A hundred things that I should say raced through my mind all at once. I decide on the first thought. "Get your _goddamn_ hands off of me!" I hissed.

He smiled again, and did what I requested. Grant then produced a ten dollar silver piece from his pocket. "I adore your accent…England, right?" He placed the money on the bar in front of me with a loud _thwack!_ "Missy, you're gonna earn _every cent_ of this ten dollars, and walk away with a lesson on manners to boot." He licks his lips in anticipation. My mouth drops in shock at his lewd offer.

_I'm worth more than ten lousy dollars! _I gain my composure, and without thinking, I bring my knee up to his groin. As he bends over in pain, moaning, his ear levels with my mouth. "I think it's _you_ that needs a lesson in manners, Mister Grant. I'll take your ten dollars in payment for the first lesson, thank you very much."

The bartender nervously hands me the drinks I had ordered on a small tray. I toss him the silver piece, and walk back to the table. To my dismay, Billy, Chavez, Doc and Steve all have amused expressions on their faces, laughing.

"Shut it!" I tell them, quickly swallowing my drink. "_All_ of you." I glance back over at the bar to see the whore help Grant stand up straight. Grant glares at me, and I slowly place my hand on my pistol, my eyes never leaving his face. Grant studies me for a second, then backs off, more interested in the whore for now.

"You sure took care of yourself back there." Doc remarks with a smile and downs his drink.

"Yup, Jessie, you sure did." Steve looks at me with wonder. "You really got him good back there!" He laughs.

Billy winks at me, downs his drink, gets up and walks over to the bar. "Are you really gonna kill Billy the Kid?" He inquires Grant.

Grant just looks at him, and calls the bartender over for another drink.

"Is that the gun you're gonna use?" Billy presses. "Can I touch it?"

"What the bloody hell is he _doing_?" I whisper to Chavez, glancing over at him for a moment as he calmly pulls out his Bowie knife.

"Protecting _you_, Bonita." Chavez observes, twirling his knife in one hand. "But I'm not so sure if you need protecting anymore."

"Oh, shit!" _What was Billy doing?_

"I really admire you, sir…" Billy continues. "I just want to touch the gun that's gonna kill the Kid."

Grant stares at Billy, and takes his pistol out. I notice it's a Colt Peacemaker with a pearl handle, a fine gun, without a doubt. "You know iron, son?"

Billy nods, as Grant passes him the gun. "Well, take a look at her, and then pass her back. That's the gun that killed Ed Rollins."

"Really?" Billy states, inspecting the gun. He then looks over at us and mouths _Bullshit! _I try not to laugh.

Grant gets the bartenders attention, as Billy is handling his gun. I watch as he carefully checks the action of the Peacemaker, as he opens the cylinder and removes the cartridges, while Grant is busy talking. _Oh, God! What is he doing?_ Billy carefully slides the cartridges into his pocket. With a quick flip of his wrist, he closes the cylinder.

"Okay…pass her back." Grant tells him. Billy smiles, and passes the Peacemaker back to him.

"Well, I'm leaving now, and I wanna know…what I need to look for, in case I see the Kid, so I can come back and tell ya."

Grant smiles. "He's a good looking fellow…dresses like a dandy and he's left handed. Folks say that he likes to whistle sad ballads." _Who says that? _I wanted to laugh out loud. _Billy's not left-handed! And Billy likes to sing, instead of whistling. _Grant pauses to finish his drink. "Now, if you see anyone that fits that description, you come back here and tell me."

"All right." Billy turns to stare into the mirror across from him, behind the bar. "I see him!"

Grant looks over at Billy, then around the room, baffled.

"Right there! See him?" he points at the mirror, laughing.

Grant frowns at Billy. "I don't have time for your wise lip, boy. If you don't stop, I'll have to drop your britches and spank your ass in front of everyone." Grant spots me sitting with Chavez, Doc and Steve and smiles at me again. _What an arrogant asshole!_

Billy stares at Grant, puckers his lips, and starts to whistle '_Silver Thread among the Gold_.' He turns to face Grant, whistling even louder, and off-key I may add.

"You're a testy little cuss." Grant mumbles, reaching for his Peacemaker, and holds it point blank at Billy's face.

Billy continues to whistle, and I see the wise-ass smirk begin to form on his face, as Grant pulls the trigger. _Click! Click! _

I watch Grant's face turn to horror, as he realizes that Billy had emptied the cartridges, and that this young whistling man in front of him is _definitely_ the Kid. On Grant's third _Click! _Billy raises his own pistol and fires. Grant staggers back into the wall, and slides onto the floor, dead. The local whore's eyes go wide in terror, and she scurries outside.

The small Saloon is filled with silence, except for Billy's whistling. "How many does that make, Doc? Twenty-Five?"

"Five."

"Call it ten." Billy walks over and sits down next to me, his arm around my shoulders.

He hands me Grant's Colt Peacemaker with a grin. "It's for you, sweetheart."

The banjo player plucks out a lively tune, as the patrons start talking, drinking and gambling again, as if nothing happened. I accept the gun, but do not return his smile.

"Shit, Billy!" I turned to face him. "Did you _have_ to kill him? I mean, he _was_ an asshole, but really, I can take care of my-"

I'm silenced with a passionate kiss, both of Billy's arms around me, holding me still. My eyes grow wide, as I open my mouth to protest, but the kiss turns deeper. I can taste the whiskey on his breath, and feel the heat between us. I slowly close my eyes and take pleasure in his kiss.

"**BILLY!**" I hear someone shout. Billy abruptly breaks off the kiss, as we look towards the door.

Charlie is standing there, looking disheveled, his eyes wide in fright and spurts out two words that we did not want to hear: "**John Kinney!**"

With those two words, we all scramble out of the Saloon and race to our horses. I can feel my heart pound like crazy, as we rapidly ride out of Fort Sumner, not looking back.

* * *

We're all riding hard and fast. I can hardly see, due to the dust and sand that our horses are kicking up. John Kinney and his men are right behind us, intent to catch all of us…or to kill us for the reward money posted on our heads. _Whichever came first, I suppose._

Besides the fear of being captured, I feel the hair on the back of my neck rise and my heart beating fast, due to the thrill of the chase. _What the hell is wrong with me? I could be caught, or killed!_

Bullets fly through the air, as we all hang on our horses, racing ahead of Kinney and his men. We all return fire, but that does not slow them down one bit.

I look ahead and gasp in panic as a reaction to the hundreds of thick and nasty looking switch trees. _There is no other way out! We have to ride through this! _I sink as low as I can in my saddle, urging my horse to run as fast as she will go. _This is going to hurt like hell!_

I scream in pain as we ride through what seems to be _thousands_ of these trees! _It's a goddamn jungle of these switch trees!_ Thorns slash through my body as I close my eyes for a moment, hoping this agony would be over soon.

I open my eyes again, to see Billy ride off to the right, and disappear over the side! _A way out!_ I quickly follow and breathe easy, realizing that we're in a small creek, minus those switch trees! I allow myself to grin, even chuckle as I can hear Kinney and his men still stuck in the forest of switch trees, looking for us. _We have escaped once again_. _Billy has saved us…again._

* * *

Situated in the hot springs area, we were hiding out, and recovering from the Kinney chase. Chavez is busy taking the thorns out of Charlie's behind, as Charlie is yelping in pain. Doc and Steve are in one of the hot springs, and Billy is sitting near us all, reading from a faded dime novel he picked up somewhere.

I sit on my bedroll, wondering where we were headed next. I pulled out my diary, and began to compose. _February 1878. Dear Diary, So much as happened in just a few weeks! Billy killed Sheriff Brady and now Peppin is the new Sheriff of Lincoln. He too needs to go down. We didn't see Murphy, but I know he's still around, giving the orders. _

I stare at Billy, who is standing and reading out loud to us. He looks back at me and smiles, with a jaunty wink. I blush, and quickly start writing in my diary once more. _I know now I have strong feelings for Billy, but don't want to show it around the others. Doc is mad as hell about our "relationship" because he cannot do anything about it, I expect. I want to have some time alone with Billy, but it seems that we are interrupted all the time! But, after all that has happened, I wonder when we will have time alone again…if ever. _

Fond recollections of the time we spent in the cave that stormy night are still vivid in my mind. I feel my face flush again; thinking of the places Billy caressed and kissed me. That was the night he started to call me his sweetheart. _That was the night he promised to take care of me._

Closing my diary, and putting it away, I thought with relief how fortunate we were that John Kinney had lost our trail! We have some time to unwind, before we have to move on. Closing my eyes, I lay on my bedroll, on my back, trying to relax, as I listen to Billy read out loud _The Authenticated Adventures of Billy the Kid_.

"I ain't left handed." He chuckles. "This ain't me!"

As I lay there, getting comfortable on my bedroll, I realize that Billy is all of a sudden silent. I open my eyes to see him crouching down next to me. "Comfortable?" He asks with a wicked grin.

"Yes." As I look into his blue eyes, I try to control the feelings swirling around inside my head. _I cannot live without him. I love him…I love Billy…**Wait!** Where are these thoughts coming from? _As if reading my mind; he leans down and gives me a kiss.

I hear Doc grunt in disapproval, but I pay no attention to him. "Billy." I hear Doc say. "Billy!"

Billy breaks off the kiss and looks over at Doc. I silently curse Doc, annoyed that he interrupted us. It seems that every time Billy and I have a few precious moments together, we get broken up. I heave a sigh, and close my eyes again.

"I'm guessing we've just gone into one big circle. I'm sure we're not headed for Lincoln again-"

"We are." Billy cuts him off.

"Fuck!" Doc spats.

"It ain't a good idea, Billy." I hear Steve comment.

"Lincoln is where we'll find the rest of the men who killed John." I open my eyes to see that Charlie and Chavez have now wandered over. Billy has a serious expression on his face, his eyes ablaze with rage. "We're gonna bury them, and then we're gonna bury Murphy." Billy looks over at me. "We take Murphy and the Santa Fe Ring falls. We kill _him,_ we win."

"What is _this_?" Doc demands. "Do you think this is a game?"

"That's right. Whoever doesn't get killed wins. You just can't forget what happened, because that's when you get slow, and they'll kill ya. The closer you get to danger, the less scared you get…the better you get. You don't feel it? I know Jess does…" Billy glances over at me for a moment. "Like when Kinney's on our ass…your hair stands up on the back of your neck and it's like…" Billy then laughs loudly, draws his gun, and shoots at a nearby cedar tree. "It's really quite a sensation… ain't it, Jess?"

I don't reply. I just stare at Billy in awe. _How can he feel exactly the same way as I do? What was it about him?_

"I'm sure it is, Billy." Doc argues. "I'm sure in your mind horns sound and the angels sing, _but I shit my goddamned pants_! So, you want to keep testing yourself? **_Fine!_** But I'm taking Jessica and we're riding to old Mexico!"

"I'm not going to old Mexico!"

"_Shut up_, Jessica! I've had **enough** of your shit!"

My eyes widen with surprise at Doc's retort. "_What_ did you say to me?" I mutter, stunned that he is talking to me this way.

"You heard. _This_ has gone on long enough! _I'm_ going to take care of you."

"Like **hell** you are!" I shout, quickly standing up. "I'm _not_ leaving New Mexico!"

I look angrily over at Doc. "I am not longer a child." I remind him, in a calm voice, surprising even myself. "I'm staying here with Billy, here in New Mexico territory. Murphy has to go down." _Of all people, Doc should understand! _"So…you want to go to old Mexico? Then, go! But as Billy said, you all will be testing yourselves, and you don't even _know_ it! Every possible way to enter old Mexico from Arizona to Texas will be covered. John Kinney knows _everyone_ down south! You'll ride through all those damn switch trees you all love so much. Old Mexico…hah! That's the game of all games, if I say so, Doc!"

"Hell, I'm in!" Billy laughs.

I stood there with my first clenched, still upset with Doc. I turn to look at Billy in surprise. _Of course I don't want to go, but if Billy wants us to go to old Mexico…we're going._

**_Author's Notes: Hoped you liked it! Please review! This is the L-O-N-G-E-S-T chapter I've written! Sorry! As always, special hugs and kisses to Tom and Sue!_**


	8. Juarez and Green Chile

**Chapter VIII Juarez and Green Chile**

_**Promises and Dreams**_

**By: tk421beth**

**_Just updated this chapter 12/28/05...I had Jessie's journal date worng! Duh!_**

**A/N: This chapter is in tribute to GREEN CHILE! For those of you that don't live in Arizona or New Mexico…let me explain the facts about green chile. It is a specialty in the Southwest…green chilies chopped up into little pieces, it's a wet sauce with bits of pork in it, and spread over everything! My favorite is a green chile cheeseburger with fries… green chile with eggs…green chile chicken burrito…yum! _Now I'm hungry!_ I grew up in California, used to Baja style Mexican food. In New Mexico/N.E. Arizona Mexican food is so much better…THE BEST EVER! **

**Also: I love all of my reviewers! Thank you so much for sticking with my story! I know it takes me forever to update, thanks for understanding! You _all _mean so much to me! _Special thanks to my betas, Sue and Tom! You both ROCK!_**

_**Tiff…Hope you like this chapter! This one's for you!**_

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**_Chapter Summary: Escaping from John Kinney and his men, Jessie and the Regulators find themselves in old Mexico…_**

We arrived in Juarez, old Mexico, safe and sound. The townspeople appear excited to see us, just like in Fort Sumner. I sigh as I dismount my horse; I'm parched, hungry and dirty. All I was want is drink, food and a hot bath.

As tired as I felt, I smiled, noticing the town is decorated for a big celebration. Colorful ribbons, piñatas, flowers and candles were everywhere, as well as local people bustling around, getting everything ready. Children were playing in the street, as Mariachis' were strolling around, making sure their instruments and voices were in tune. _Maybe later I will join the party_._ Right now, I just need to unwind!_

I unfastened my saddle bags quickly rushed into the nearest hotel and paid for a room and a hot bath. _Some peace and quiet is what I need right now_.

"I can have your bath ready right away." The old man at the desk told me in Spanish, handing me the key to my room He also informed me that the whole town was starting their siesta shortly, and that I would have to wait for food and drink until the fiesta later tonight. He offered me a glass of tequila, though.

"Thanks!" I replied in Spanish, drinking it. "This is good!" _Food could wait until later, after my bath._

"The maid will attend to you shortly." The clerk smiled back at me, as I paid for everything, and signed the hotel register.

The hotel room was small, with a huge bed near the window, overlooking the street. A single chair sat next to a small table against the wall. A single dresser with a mirror on top held a water basin and some towels. I laid my shotgun and my gun belt over the chair. Waiting for the maid to arrive and ready my hot bath, I lay on the bed and pulled out my diary.

_March/April 1878_

_Not sure what the date is…that does not seem important at this time. We're in Juarez, old Mexico hiding out once again. We got John Kinney off our trail, hopefully for good. _

_I wonder if Alex has contacted the legal authorities, or anyone that could help us. The Santa Fe Ring needs to be stopped…I just hope one day, this will be over and done with. I cannot believe what has happened in the last few months. We are now wanted outlaws and I hope to get my revenge before I get caught, or killed. As always, Doc, Charlie, Chavez and Steve all care about my overall welfare, but Billy's the only one who in every way understands me. I love Billy…_

I gasped in surprise at how easily it was to write that last sentence. _I hardly knew Billy, how could I be in love with him?_ I frowned, perplexed about my feelings for Billy as I closed my diary, and packed it away.

The maid finally arrived, and began to fill the tub with hot water. After the tub was filled, she handed me a bar of lavender soap, a sponge and a large towel. When she left, I quickly undressed, and relaxed in the tub, enjoying the feel of the hot water. I closed my eyes and sighed with content. Nothing could make me happier.

I sighed, and dipped my head into the water. I could feel my muscles relaxing as I soaked in the hot water. Grabbing the soap, I washed my hair, making sure it was squeaky clean. My thoughts drifted to Billy as I sat back and closed my eyes once more. _What we have is special. I know you feel it too...don't doubt what you feel._

A knock on the door interrupted my thoughts. _Why is the maid back? Did she forget to leave me something? _Without opening my eyes, I told her in Spanish to come in, as I picked up the soap again, and started to slowly lather my arms.

"Room service for the Sweetheart Shooter!" Billy's voice rang out with a loud snicker.

My eyes flew open, as the soap flew from my hand. _What the hell-!_ My head whipped around to see Billy kick the door closed behind him. Billy was carrying a tray with some delicious smelling food, and some tequila. He also carried a large rectangular box. "What in the _bloody hell_ are you doing here, Billy? You scared the _shit_ out of me!" I yelled at him. "And quit calling me _that_!"

Billy cackled, as he placed the tray of food and drinks on the small table and sat on the edge of the bed, the box in next to him.

"How did you know I was here?" I demanded. Billy just smiled yet again. I then noticed he had taken a bath and put on new garments. He looked _very_ handsome. "Going to the fiesta later?" I asked, trying hard not to stare.

"You're coming with me, sweetheart." My heart pounded with excitement. _I was going with him! He asked me to accompany him!_

I gave him a small smile, not wanting Billy to know how happy I really was. "Where did you get the food? Hasn't the siesta started yet?"

"Yes it has…but I persuaded a young gal to make this. I brought this for you an' me, Jessie."

I looked over at the plate. Tortillas, beans, rice and two juicy steaks with green chile…_oh, it looked good!_ My mouth watered. "That looks wonderful!" I told him, licking my lips. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome!" He laughed, pouring the tequila, and walking over to me, holding two glasses. He had that notorious smirk on his face, as he handed me a glass.

"What shall we drink to?"

"A hot bath…_and_ tequila!" He laughed again, downing his drink.

"To green chile!" I giggled, swallowing the tequila.

Taking my glass, he squatted down next to the tub. A devilish light glittered in his blue eyes, as he rolled up his sleeves. "Need help with your back?" He grinned, picking up the cake of soap that went airborne out of my hand a minute ago.

My face reddened in response to his provocative offer. "…Uh…" It seemed that I was at a loss for words. _I can't believe I just said that! This whole time, for days I had wished that Billy and I had some time together. Now that we are alone…I don't know what to do…how to feel…Oh, God!_

Billy chuckled as if he knew what I was thinking. He grabbed the sponge and dipped it in the tub. He then rubbed the soap into it, making a generous lather. "Lean forward, Jessie."

I did as he requested. "What's in the box?" I questioned, as he slowly moved the sponge over my back. It took all of my self-control not to groan out loud in pleasure.

"A gift for you, sweetheart."

"For me?" _Billy bought me something? Why did he do that? Wait a second…to hell with why, that's so sweet! _I glanced over at him. "What is it?"

Billy laughed, and stood up. "Get out and you'll find out soon enough." He held out the towel for me. I gingerly stepped out of the tub, and took the towel from Billy, wrapping it around myself.

"Open it." He said, laughing, as I hurried over to the bed, like a child on Christmas. I opened the box and gasped. Inside was a dark green dress, similar to the one Father presented to me on New Year's Eve…also the eve of my sixteenth birthday. I loved that dress, but I couldn't take it with me. I held it up, marveling over the delicate fabric. Tiny beads were sewn throughout the dress, I noticed. The dress had cap sleeves and low-cut bodice.

"There's more!" I looked over to see Billy grinning. I was taken aback to see at the bottom of the box lay undergarments, a brush, and other various feminine accoutrements.

I felt the tears swell up, as I looked over at Billy, who was now sitting next to me. This was _some_ gift. "Thank you!" I told him, hugging him. My arms went around his neck as my body pressed close to him.

"Do you like it?" He asked, hugging me back.

"Yes, I do…very much so, Billy. I _love_ it!" I kissed him on the cheek. "You made me _very_ happy."

Billy smiled. "Good! I wanted to get you a green dress, to match your pretty eyes. I tried to find you one like the dress you wore on your birthday." He then cupped my face with his hands. "You deserve it, Jess. You deserve to be happy." Billy whispered, kissing me.

I kiss him back, enjoying the fact that no one would interrupt us _this_ time. I gasped in delight as Billy's lips traveled from my lips to my neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses. With a muttered curse, he quickly took my towel off, and threw it to the floor.

Growling, he pounced on top of me, pinning me down on the bed. I squealed with delight, which in a split second, turned into a low moan of pleasure as his talented tongue recaptured my mouth. My entire body feels alive; all my senses are tingling, as he quickly shed his clothing.

"Hurry, Billy…I _need_ you." I tell him, as his arms are now around me, holding me close to him. "I've waited so _long_ for this!" I slowly kiss Billy's neck, as my hands travel the length of his body, pleased with his low groans of pleasure.

"We don't have to make an appearance until after the siesta." He whispers into my ear. I could feel the hunger in his hands as they roamed over me, caressing and fondling, making me burn. "That's at least two hours. Let's take pleasure in the time we have now."

"I love you, Billy." I suddenly burst out, looking into his eyes, my fingers curling in his hair. _Why in the **hell** did I say that…and of all times right now?_

His caresses abruptly stopped. "Do you, Jess?" He asks me, his expression serious; his blue eyes connecting with my green ones. "Do you mean that?"

"Ye-yes, I do." I stutter; horrified at what he would say next. My heart jumped as I stared up at Billy. _Did I scare him off? Will he just up and leave? **Oh, God damnit!**_

"Good." Billy slowly grins, as his index finger traces my lower lip. "But, right now, I'm gonna make love to you, until you can't take it any longer."

_The soft caress of Billy's hands everywhere…his face in my neck…the smell of his musky scent…I feel like I could die right now of bliss…_

* * *

"Wake up, sleepyhead…" Billy whispers into my ear. "C'mon, sweetheart…"

I mumble a curse, and snuggle closer to Billy, my face against his chest. I enjoy being in his arms, and do not want to get up. My eyes still closed, I smiled, reminiscing what we did in the last two hours…_making love…drinking the tequila…eating a wonderful steak supper…making love over and over again…_

"The siesta is over…time to get up." He chuckled, squeezing my behind. "Let's get dressed and go to the fiesta!"

Muttering another curse, I slowly opened my eyes, to see him smiling, as usual. "I'm hungry!" I yawn, stretching like a cat.

Billy laughs as he gets up, gathering his clothing, and begins to get dressed. "There's still a little bit of food left."

I wrap myself in the towel, and eat some of the leftover steak. After a few minutes, I start to get ready.

I finish dressing, and start to brush my hair. I see Billy is now fully dressed. He's leaning against the door, studying me through half-lowered lids. "Christ! You look damn beautiful!"

"You think so?" I ask him, standing up and peering into the mirror. I see nothing special.

Billy laughs, and in the mirror, I see him walk up behind me. "I know so." His arms slide around my waist, molding my body to his. _Even though we just made love…twice…or was it three times? I want him again, right now! _Billy's lips tickle the back of my neck, the touch of his warm lips send my head spinning.

"Billy!" I sway back into him, my hands grasping his forearms, which are still around my waist.

"I have one more present for you, sweetheart." He murmurs in my ear, as his hands fiddle with his vest pocket. "Close your eyes!"

I do as he requested, biting my lip in anticipation. "You already bought me _too_ much!"

I feel something cold on my neck. "Open your eyes Jess." I do so, and gasp in surprise at the reflection in the mirror. _He bought me a beautiful silver heart on a chain! A necklace!_

"Oh my God, Billy!" I turn and hug him tight. "It's beautiful!" I kiss his face over and over again.

Billy laughs, pleased at my reaction, and pulls me close. "Read it."

I quickly hold it up. _'More than Pals' _is on the front of the heart. I quickly turn it over to see _S.S. + B.T.K. _inscribed on the back. _Sweetheart Shooter + Billy the Kid. _I look up at him, my mouth agape. I can't speak.

Billy kisses me lightly on the lips. "You know I care for you, Jess." He steps back and offers me his arm. "Ready?"

I nod, taking his arm, as we head towards the festivity.

"Oh, sweetheart, I almost forgot to tell you…"

"What?"

"Charlie's gettin' married!"

**_Whew! That took me forever! I thank you all for being so patient! Hope you liked it! Please remember to review! Thanks!_**


	9. Seeds of Doubt

**Chapter IX Seeds of Doubt**

_**Promises and Dreams**_

**By tk421beth**

* * *

**A/N: I want to thank ALL my reviewers! This chapter is for YOU ALL! I do appreciate everything you say, and you all keep me goin'! You ALL inspire me to write better. I LOVE YOU ALL!**

* * *

**_Special thanks to Sue and Tom…you both rock my world!_**

* * *

**_Chapter Summary: Taking a break in Juarez, Jessie was just informed by Billy that Charlie is getting married!_**

The music was lively, and the fiesta in full swing by the time Billy and I arrived. We only just missed the wedding, but an abundance of food and drink were accessible now that the siesta was over. The local people, as well as the Regulators were dancing, eating and drinking. I spot Chavez dancing with a sweet little girl, and Steve dancing with an elderly woman, pausing from time to time to spit his tobacco. Doc was busy eating fajitas and drinking the local whisky by himself.

Billy and I danced over to Charlie and his bride, Manuela, a young beautiful Mexican gal. I congratulated Charlie, giving him a big hug, as well as Manuela, whom I didn't know until tonight.

"Jessie! Dance with me!" Charlie laughed as he took my hand, sounding a tad bit intoxicated. I laughed as well, as Billy twirled Manuela around, her long brown hair flowing in the air.

Charlie looked exceptionally content as he danced with me. "Well, I did it, Jessie!"

"I'm so happy for you, Charlie...Manuela's beautiful, and you look very handsome!" I meant it with all my heart. He did indeed look attractive in a new suit, boots, and an enormous smile plastered on his face. "You picked a good night to get married…the fiesta was planned before we got here."

"Yeah!" Charlie smiled, as we danced. "Gosh, you sure look nice."

"Thanks, Charlie." I smiled back at him, and tried not to blush.

Several minutes later, I excused myself, and sat down next to Doc, who was now reading and watching the merrymaking from afar, smoking a cigarette. "Hiya, Doc!" I said, cooling off by drinking some of the wine.

Doc grinned, as he put his book away. "You look very nice, Jessica. Are you having fun?"

"Thanks, Doc! I am having a _lot_ of fun!" I observe the people dancing, and spot Billy talking and laughing with Charlie and Steve. He noticed my stare, and gave me a wink.

"What _is_ that?" Doc indicated my necklace. He leaned over, and read the inscription on the front and back. I held my breath, waiting for him to yell at me…I could see the irritation in his eyes, but he didn't speak.

I sip the wine, and nibble on some of the fajitas. It tastes delicious!

"_More_ than pals, huh?" Doc stated, staring at me intently. "Wonder where he picked that necklace up?"

I say nothing, and continue to eat and drink.

"Do you love him, Jessica?"

I see that his face full of concern, as I swallow my food. "Yes, I do, Doc. I do love Billy." _There. I said it. It's out in the open now._

"Does he love you?"

"What's with all the questions tonight?" I nervously laugh, trying to change the subject. _Billy didn't specifically tell me that he loved me, not those exact words, but I know he does. Of course he does! Does a bird love to fly?_

"Jessica, I care about you and I don't want to see you get hurt." He persisted, holding my hand. "You're wise beyond your years, there's no doubt about _that_. But with matters of the heart…you're still a child."

I give Doc a spiteful glare, and remove my hand from his. "I can take care of myself, Doc."

He stubbed out his cigarette, his blue eyes still fixed on me. "How 'bout a dance?" Doc unexpectedly asks me, standing up and holding his hand out. I stood and smiled as I accepted Doc's hand. We headed towards the crowd of dancers.

Something unexpectedly stopped me in my tracks. I was staring at Billy, _my Billy, _who was dancing with a local gal. She was giggling loudly at something Billy was whispering into her ear.

My smile turned into a frown, as my eyes narrowed in hatred. _What the hell was he doing with that whore! _I went for my gun, and forgot that I was wearing a dress. My blood boiled. _It was pure luck for Billy that I wasn't armed._

I see Doc give me a puzzled glance. He follows my stare and sighs, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Sometimes things aren't always what they seem."

I spun around to face him. "What the _hell_ do you mean by that?"

Doc's eyes followed Billy as he danced with the girl. "I always mean what I say, Jessica…and always say what I mean."

"Oh, shut it, Doc!" I spat angrily. _Damn him and the way he always talks in riddles!_

Doc told me to calm down, as we slowly began to dance. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Billy, no matter what I did. I took the lead, trying to edge us over where Billy was dancing with that _woman_. _Did he just kiss her?_ I twisted my neck, trying to see what they were doing, forcing Doc over even closer to them. They both now were laughing and smiling. _That rat bastard! I'll wipe that damned smile off his face…_

"_I'm_ supposed to lead, Jessica." I look up to see Doc's annoyed face. Giving me an intent look, he proceeded to take over, forcing us further and further away from Billy.

_How could Billy do this to me? I told him I loved him! _I tried to ignore the pangs of jealously, but could not disregard it. _I hate Billy! No…I love him…oh, bloody hell!_

Doc didn't say a word about Billy as we danced. He tried to cheer me up, but the frown on my face was there to stay. We were dancing near the adobe wall, away from the large crowd of dancers.

"Ahem!" I look towards my right and see Billy at my side, asking Doc if he could cut in and dance with me. I pleaded with Doc with my eyes, hoping he'd understand that I _didn't_ want to dance with Billy. Doc gave me a small smirk, and placed my hand in Billy's.

_Damnation to bloody hell! Why did he do that? _Billy gave me a grin, as he grasped my other hand, and slowly pulled me towards him, his arms now around my waist.

"Whatsamatter, Jessie?" He gave me a devilish grin.

I looked up at him, glaring. As if he didn't know! _If looks could kill…_

"Aw, c'mon, sweetheart. Don't be like this! I was just havin' some fun!"

"It looked like you were having _more_ than fun. Damn it, Billy! Why in the _hell_ were you dancing with that…that…_puta_?" _I blurted out puta…Spanish for whore_. I tried to push Billy away, trying to twist out of his grasp. "Let me go!" He seemed amused by my struggles, and his hold around my waist only tightened. _I wasn't going anywhere_. "Let me go, damn you!"

"Jess…you don't want me to let you go, do you?" He whispered into my ear, as he pushed me up against the wall. He reached out a finger to gently trace the line of my jaw. Despite the fact that I'm still infuriated, Billy's touch sends a shiver down my spine. I silently curse my weakness; it is as if his mere touch arouses me! I feel my pulse race as a moan escapes my lips. _I am under his spell…Billy has complete power over me, and he knows it._ _I can't look at him. I can't…_ "You look so damn beautiful when you're mad." His fingers travel down my neck, his caress warm and gentle just above my breasts. "I told you I'd take care of you…we're more than pals, remember?" His hand is now slowly stroking my neck, as he forces me to look into his startling blue eyes. "You love me, don't you, sweetheart?" He had a slight smile on his face, his eyes staring straight into mine. _How can I resist? How can I stay angry? How can I say no to Billy? I do love him…I do…_

Pushing me harder against the wall, he abruptly kisses me, hard, one hand on my neck, holding my head still, and the other pinning me to the wall, so I couldn't get away. I close my eyes as the kiss deepens…and all is forgiven. Billy sighs, and pulls me back to reality. We leisurely begin to dance, and my frown is now replaced with a wide smile.

Much later I find myself laughing hard at one of Billy's dirty jokes. I throw my arms around his neck, unable to stop laughing. I enjoy the feel of his hot breath against my face, as he too was laughing. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Doc staring at us, his expression grim.

Without warning, a large piñata was smashed open by a young child wielding a big stick. All the children of the village scrambled forward, trying to get at the hundreds of trinkets and candy all over the ground. Billy and I find ourselves being pushed out of the way by the small mob. We both laugh, and hand in hand, began to walk away from the fiesta, and towards the hotel.

"Where are we going? The party isn't over yet, Billy!" I complained with a smile, showing that I wasn't _too_ disappointed.

"You bet your sweet derrière it ain't!" He kissed me, as his hands grasp my behind, pulling me close to him. "I ain't through with you yet!"

"_Billy_!" I giggled, my hands pressed against his chest. I could feel his desire hard on my thigh.

A huge shadow falls over us, and I look past Billy's shoulder to see a tall man with dark hair and eyes standing there, with a pistol in his hand. I gasp in terror. _Who is that?_

Billy right away perceives my fear, and quickly spins around; one of his guns suddenly in his hand. I find myself positioned behind Billy, his other arm extended out, protecting me. "Pat Garrett." Billy mutters. "What are you doing here?"

I allow myself to breathe. Pat Garrett was a known trail driver and buffalo hunter in Texas. Garrett was no bounty hunter, but why was he here in Juarez?

"I'm going back to Louisiana," He simply said, putting his gun away. "I wanted to see the boy who's become such a sensation since we last met." His dark eyes drifted to me, and his face lit up with a smile.

"This is the Sweetheart Shooter." Billy introduced me.

I mumbled a curse, as I took a step forward, and stood right next to Billy. Folding my arms in front of me, I scowled at my hated nickname.

"I thought her name was Jessica Tunstall." It was more of a statement than a question.

My mouth opened in surprise. _He didn't call me the Sweetheart Shooter! _I boldly stared at him, with a slight smile. His brown eyes held my gaze, as he smiled back. I suddenly felt like I was naked, the way his eyes slowly looked me up and down, so intense, that he saw right through me. My mouth went dry, as I felt my face flush. _What the bloody hell is going on here?_

"How'd you know I was here?" Billy's voice snapped me back to reality, his gun still pointed.

"I'm a tracker." His eyes were still fixed on me. "Gonna be a hell of a Sheriff if they elect me. The officials have asked me to run."

"I'm askin' you to run, too." He waved his gun north. "That way…or I'll take your scalp like I did Brady's."

"I'm not the law yet, Billy! And I'm not here to get your ass hairs up. The truth is, I'm here to tell you some bad news about a friend we share. McSween, Tunstall's lawyer."

_What? What the hell is going on? What's he talking about?_ My head was spinning, and I felt faint, expecting to hear some awful news. Billy, who always senses my feelings, took hold of my hand, and squeezed it reassuringly.

"What about Alex?"

"He's gonna die. Tomorrow…he and his wife…at his house." Garrett sighed, and looked straight into my eyes. "Murphy knows he's coming back to Lincoln tomorrow. They're gonna wait until he's home, then go pay a visit."

I felt my heart leap into my throat. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't talk. _That's right…Alex and Susan were in hiding. Why were they going back into Lincoln? Was this information Pat Garrett told us accurate? Was Murphy really going after Alex? _Billy lowered his gun, and shoved it back into the holster. "What time are they expectin' him?"

"Supper time. I figured you're the only fella with the pluck to get up a bunch of McSween partisans and go give the man and his wife a rightful escort across the border." Garrett was still staring at me, and I wondered if Billy realized it. "I haven't been to Louisiana for quite a spell. I'll see ya, Billy." Garrett tipped his hat at me, as his brown eyes gaze over my body once more. "Miss Tunstall."

Billy then turned toward me, looking disturbed at this latest news. He let go of my hand, and folded his arms across his chest. "Garrett…are you my friend?"

I looked over Billy's shoulder. I saw Garrett turn slightly towards us, his hand hovering over his gun belt. I held my breath as he thought it over for a moment. Garrett then removed his hand away from his pistol. "Yes, I am, Bill." He then walked to his horse, mounted, and rode quietly away.

"What are we going to do, Billy?" I asked him, my lower lip trembling, thinking of Alex and Susan. _We have to save them! We have to get them out of Lincoln!_

Billy gently kissed my lips. "What we do best, Jess! We're gonna go back to Lincoln."

* * *

The wedding reception was still in full swing as I raced towards my hotel room and quickly changed into my riding gear. I packed everything back in my saddle bags, and headed outside to find Billy waiting for me with our horses, ready to go.

"Ready?" He asked me, a slight smirk on his face, as I made sure my saddlebags were in place. I nodded my agreement, as I mounted my mare.

Billy shot a single bullet up in the air to get everyone's attention. The music suddenly stopped; the dancing comes to an end. All eyes are on us. "**REGULATORS!**" He shouts, as we ride towards the middle of the fiesta.

I stare at Charlie, who looks as if a nightmare has now begun. Manuela was clutching him tight, starting to sob. My hearts goes out for him, as I hoped he wasn't going to be stupid enough to go with us. Charlie needs to stay here in Juarez with his bride.

"Charlie, maybe you should stay here." Billy tells him. "You can't shoot worth a damn…and you're wife is really cryin'. She's giving me a headache."

I give Billy a furious look, while I resist the urge to smack him.

Charlie looks numb, as he untangles himself from his bride, and slowly walks over to us and mounts his horse. Manuela cries loudly in her Mother's arms. I feel my throat tighten, wondering why Charlie is going with us. _He just only got married! What the hell is wrong with him? He should stay here!_

"Go ahead, Charlie, stay here," Doc tells him. "You got a wife now."

Charlie gives all of us a small smile. "It ain't easy havin' pals."

_**Okay, guys! You know what to do! REVIEW! Be nice….lol**_


	10. Impending Doom

**Chapter X Impending Doom**

_**Promises and Dreams**_

**By tk421beth**

**_I, again have updated the dates in Jessie's journal._**

**A/N: Did you know that the McSween shoot out was the conclusion of the Lincoln County war? It lasted FIVE days! Just a little bit of trivia for you History freaks out there!**

**_Special thanks for all my faithful reviewers! Thanks for all the great reviews! You all inspire me to write more and better chapters! Amber, JoJo, Tiffster…I LOVE YA!_**

**_MANY thanks to Sue and Tom…thanks again for the help and encouragement! You keep me rockin' and rollin'!_**

* * *

**_Chapter Summary: While in Juarez, old Mexico, Billy and Jessie hear the news that Murphy and his men are planning to kill Alex and Susan McSween in their home. The Regulators are now heading back to Lincoln to save them…_**

Arriving in Lincoln, I'm surprised to see that the town is so quiet at this time of day. The street is lifeless, making me feel uneasy. I can't help but feel the aura of impending doom. I try to ignore the hairs standing on the back of my neck, as I sense the nervousness in my mare. The feeling of dread suddenly sweeps over me. _This is a bad omen. Something terrible is going to happen. _I don't say a word as we ride through, on the way to the McSween house.

Chavez rides up to me. Giving me a worried look, I _knew_ he would understand what I'm thinking. "Chavez, something horrible is going to take place…I can _feel _it." I say in a low voice.

He looks directly into my eyes. "I believe you, Bonita. I feel the corral gate of the Spirit Horse has been open. Even as we speak, he gallops towards us."

I gulp, full well knowing what Chavez meant.

Riding behind us, Steve swears loudly. "Goddamn your Spirit Horse to hell, Chavez! We're already spooked enough!"

Chavez looks back at him. "Better hope the Spirit Horse is not galloping towards _you_."

No one speaks the rest of the way to the McSween home. Finally arriving, I quickly dismount, and grab my belongings. Not even bothering to knock on the door, I burst inside, throwing my saddlebags on the floor, and grabbing my shotgun from my back. "Alex! Susan!" I holler, running through the house, finding Alex at his desk, working on some paperwork.

"What in the name of-!" Alex looks shocked to see me, with my weapon at hand. His eyebrows shoot up over his eyeglasses. "Jessica… what are you doing here?"

"No time to explain, Alex. We've got to get you and Susan out of here!" I plead, as the rest of the Regulators run inside.

"Alex," Billy comes running up behind me, his guns drawn. "Let's go. They're gonna kill you…the word's out."

Alex gives Billy a harsh glare. "I told you _not_ to come here. I'm _not_ leaving my house."

As the rest of the Regulators spread out, Susan comes downstairs, with a concerned look on her face. She sees me, and rushes over, hugging me tight.

I hug her back. "Susan, we've got to get out of here! We have to leave **NOW**!" I tell her. I see a worried look spread over her features, as she grasps the conviction of my emotions.

"What exactly is going on-?" She whispers to me.

"If you stay, Alex," Billy calmly tells him, "They're gonna kill you. Then I'm gonna have to go and kill all the people that killed you. That's a lot of killin'."

I study Alex, and see that he is not well. His asthma is noticeably worse, and it looks like he hasn't slept in days. He looks plain terrible.

"Alex," Susan tells him. "Maybe…"

"**You heard me! I'm not leaving!**"

"Well, we can't just stay here and hope the good Lord saves us from an all out-"

"I'm sick, Susan. I can't go to goddamned old Mexico!"

"Don't worry," Doc tells him, looking out the window. "The trip's been cancelled."

I rush over behind Doc, and peer out the window. Sheriff Peppin and about ten of his men are hitching their horses, throwing their saddle bags, and diving into position. "Oh my God!" My eyes widen. "It's a trap. **A goddamned trap!** I'm going to _kill_ Garrett! That damned son of a-"

"How's the east side, Chavez?" Billy interrupts me, his hand on my shoulder, looking out to see Peppin and his posse.

"Murphy men."

"How 'bout you, Charlie? Can we make a break?"

I hear Charlie gasp in terror. _What the hell is he looking at? _I turn around and look at him, my eyebrow raised. "It's John Kinney!" He declares.

My eyes narrow, as my jaw tightens. _How could we be so stupid? A trap! We're trapped! How in the hell were we going to get out of this? _I look back at Billy, who has that shit-eating grin on his face. _Uh oh! What's he up to now?_

"It's John Kinney!" Charlie yells as he runs over to us.

"Maybe they just want us." Billy says.

"No," Alex utters, placing his glasses on the desk. "I don't think so. They can end this war in one fell swoop right here, and that's what they're about to do."

"It's John Kinney!" Charlie shouts again, his face suddenly pale.

"**Okay, Charlie!**" Doc yells at him, still looking out the window, taking aim with his rifle. "Thank you very much!"

"We're gonna hang for sure now!" He shouts, holding his rifle so tight, that his knuckles turn as white as his face.

"Bonney!" Peppin's voice calls from outside. "We got ya up there, Kid…you and the Sweetheart Shooter! You both take a _real_ good look at the firepower down here! Now, all you come out real slow!"

I drop to my knees, shotgun still in hand. _Whoever bestowed that name on me, I will get my revenge later. _I look over at Billy who is smiling.

"You there, Bonney?" Peppin calls out again. "Tunstall?"

Billy is flat against the wall beside the window, not daring to look out. I glace up at him, wondering what he was going to do. I sure in hell _wasn't_ going to respond to Peppin.

"Yeah, we hear ya Peppin-!" His words barely come out of his mouth, as they open fire, blasting all the windows in. I drop my shotgun, and lay flat on the floor, hands over my head, as shards of glass fall all around me. I close my eyes, hoping this attack would end soon.

The firing suddenly stops. I open my eyes, to see the windows at Doc and Chavez's side of the house were also blown out. Billy starts to chuckle, then laughs loudly. I look up at him, thinking that he's gone mad. He takes my hand in his. "I'll get us out of here, Jessie…I promise you that. I always keep my promises."

I look into his eyes and notice his features were dead serious as he stared back. "You better!" I replied with a small smile.

Billy chuckles, and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. I sit up and gingerly brush off the remaining glass that is sticking to me. Billy now is sitting against the wall again, guns in each hand. _I know Billy will get me out of here alive. He promised that he would take care of me. I know we'll get out of this alive…_

"What the hell are we gonna do now?" Doc wonders.

"We gotta show them that they met their match." Billy answers with a grin. "Hey! Peppin!"

"I'm hearin' ya, Bonney!" He yells back.

"I see that you have Charlie Crawford down there!"

"Yeah, we got him, Kid. We got a whole lot of-" Peppin doesn't get a chance to finish. Billy all of a sudden springs up into the window, and fires a single shot. He then takes his place back against the wall. Biting my lip, I slowly get up, glancing out of the window, to see that Billy shot Crawford right between the eyes. I watch him fall to the ground, dead. Gasping, I quickly duck down under the window again. "Good shot!" I tell him.

Billy winks at me. "Hey! Peppin! Charlie Crawford ain't with you no more!" He shouts with glee, glancing out of the window.

"Bastard!" I hear Peppin's voice. "**FIRE!**"

They open up again, just as Billy dives out of view, and lands right next to me. Bullets chip away at the adobe structure. I lay on the ground, my shotgun underneath me, trying to figure out how in the hell we were going to get out of this alive. I see Alex holding Susan close, as bullets fly through the house. Dishes break, splinters of wood fly from various pieces of furniture that have been shot. I cling to Billy, my face pressed against his chest, my eyes tightly shut. _Billy will get me out of here…he promised me. Billy will get me out of here…he promised me. _I run that mantra through my mind over and over.Those two thoughts seem to calm me down, as Billy holds me close.

"These boys just won't give up!" Billy chuckles, as the attack stops again. He slowly stands up, smiling as if nothing was happening.

"You okay ma'am?" Steve asks Susan, who is hanging onto Alex. "You okay?" She just looks at him with a blank look on her face. Susan is obviously in shock.

"Charlie, take your rifles and go upstairs." Billy orders, totally in control. "Doc…go with him and load heavy."

I glance over at Charlie, who is as white as a sheet, his eyes closed, and his hands shaking like a leaf. He gulped loudly, and then did what Billy told him to do, with Doc following close behind. Steve slowly ambles upstairs after them.

"Alex," Billy turns to him, holding out one of his guns. "This may be your last chance to handle John's case."

"Active participation in a gun battle negates my life insurance policy. I can't do that." He retorts, with a wild look on his face.

Baffled, Billy stares at Alex. Cocking his Winchester, he turns to me. "Ready, Sweetheart?"

I nod, following Alex and Susan up the stairs. Billy and Chavez are standing at the front door when the shooting starts again. I yelp and turn, looking down the stairwell to see Chavez kick the half-blasted door closed with the heel of his boot. Bullets flying from the outside, they both run up the stairs right behind me.

I sit in between Billy and Doc as the sun sets over Lincoln. The silence was eerie. As we sat close together, it seemed we were worlds apart. It was so quiet; I could hear the men breathing out on the street. Staring out the tattered window frame reminded me of a cheap dime store novel, as I watched Murphy, Dolan and Peppin's men; crouching as they moved into different positions. It all seemed like a dream…so foreign…so far away…but yet, we were here. _This is real._

I kept waiting for my Father to come into my room and wake me from this nightmare. I continued to stare out the window, not moving, not talking. We all fell into a silent repose, as the sun sets over Lincoln's rolling hills.

Memories of my recent childhood come flooding back to me. It seems hard to believe that over a year ago, I considered myself a child, and witnessed the same sunset over a million times. In a strange way, the sunset brought me renewed hope, that all would be well with the promise of the coming of a new day.

_**So…what do you think? Short chapter for me, huh? Please review! Thanks!**_


	11. A New Day

**Chapter XI A New Day**

**Promises and Dreams**

**By tk421beth**

**A/N: I want to thank my faithful reviewers! I LOVE YOU! Amber, Dana, Jo, Jeannie, the Vampire Jewel, Mononoke Lynn, HellAngelGirl, MizzNite, billycrazy…you ALL inspire me to write more and more! Thanks for all your great reviews and positive comments! As for Tiffy…Where ARE you? It's been two weeks, girl! Review this and my last chapter PLEASE!**

_**Special thanks to my betas Sue and Tom! THANKS!**_

* * *

**_Chapter Summary: Jessie and the Regulators realize that they have fallen in a trap as they huddle inside the McSween home..._**

I watch as the sun sets gradually over Lincoln. I fiddled with my ring…the ring Father had given to me. _What would he do if he was here? Oh, Father! I need you! _My eyes begin to water, wondering if this is it. _Will I soon join Father? Will I have the same fate as he did? _

I feel Billy's hand slowly, gently massage my neck. "It's okay sweetheart…" He says in a low voice. _How does he always know what I am thinking? _"Remember what I told you. I'll get us outta here."

I look over at him, and see his wide smile. I return the smile and hear him chuckle.

As the house grew dark, I stare out the window once more, to see that more men were congregating outside, heavily armed. I sat back down with a big yawn. Feeling fatigued, I lay my shotgun down next to me, lean against Billy, and close my eyes.

I listened to the noises outside, as well as the quiet whispering going on inside of the McSween home. As Billy's arms slowly wrapped around me, I cuddled up to him, my face against his chest. I could feel his heart beating, as my eyes remain closed, not wanting to fight sleep. _Billy will get us out of here. He promised…_

* * *

I stir to the sound of drums, softly at first, then becoming much louder. I open my eyes, surprised that it is early morning already. The sun hasn't even come up yet. I find myself on the floor, lying next to Billy. My face was against his neck, as his left arm was around my waist. "Billy!" I gasped, waking him up. "What is that?" 

"Chivato!" Yelled Chavez, motioning Billy to come over and look out the window. I grab my shotgun, and race to Chavez and Billy. My eyes widen in surprise to see the army!

There were two squadrons with some men marching, some riding horses. I also see a lethal looking gatling gun, being pulled by four horses. _What in the hell were they going to use that for? _

"Where did they come from?" I wonder out loud. "Fort Stanton?" Most of the soldiers were black. _It's the damn Buffalo Soldiers! _They were lead by a large white man, who was now dismounting his horse. I study the man, and acknowledge from the brass on his starched uniform, that he is indeed, a Colonel. Sheriff Pippin ambled over, and the two men began to talk. I strained to hear them, but they were talking in hushed tones, much to my frustration.

"They called in the goddamned troops!" Steve yells in a sudden panic, making me jump.

Disgusted by the scene below, I turn away from the scene. I observe Steve, who is now looking out the window. His eyes were open wide as well as his mouth. I could even see the chewing tobacco wadded in his cheek.

Doc sighs. "We're good, but this is getting a little out of hand. We're not _that_ good!"

Billy sniggers. "I like these odds!" He states, laughing. I smile, as I examine Doc giving Billy a mean stare.

Susan rushes over, her hands full of papers, some dishes, and other assorted items she been packing into various trunks. Some loose strands of hair fell to her face, from the bun on top of her head. "They must be here to mediate; to break the whole thing up…thank God!" She looks over at Alex. "The townspeople must have contacted them. Maybe you should send a message down."

"Bloody hell, which one of us is going to give them the message, Susan?" I challenged. "I, for one, do not want to get killed!" Susan gives me a surprised look, not quite believing what I just told her.

Ignoring her for the moment, I made sure my shotgun was still loaded and walked back to the window, in between Billy and Doc. I spot Murphy riding up in his carriage, his china doll, Yen, in tow. She was dressed for this occasion in a black and dark red dress, sitting next to that _bastard _Murphy, who started this whole bloody war. She looked up, and stared right at Billy, Doc and I.

I glance over at Doc, who is staring at Yen, his blue eyes starting to water. _He loves her! Doc actually loves her! _I was touched to see Doc this way. I knew he had feelings for Yen, but did not know she felt the same way about him.

"Mr. Murphy, Judge Bristol. We've got all the rats in one hole!" I hear J.J. Dolan yelling with glee. _That smug bastard!_

Murphy nods. "What's been taking so long?" He actually sounds bored.

"Every time we try to get in close, we lose men! They've got about thirty, maybe forty boys up there." Dolan tells him. "Jessie Tunstall too!"

"Son of a bitch!" Spats Doc. I silently agree. _Goddamn Dolan!_

Murphy jumps out of the carriage, and shakes hands with the Colonel. _Oh, God! Was Susan so entirely mistaken! The townspeople didn't summon the military! Lawrence Murphy did! _I hear Murphy's loud, booming voice from the street. "Why are you here, Nathan?" He asks the Colonel, surprised to see the military in Lincoln. _This isn't good! Murphy knows the Colonel? But he seems surprised to see him…okay…I was wrong. Maybe the army came here on special orders…but from whom?_

"I was dispatched here, to make sure it doesn't get out of the hands of the civil authorities." He answers Murphy.

"I didn't want the army here. We don't need this kind of attention!" Murphy's face was red with anger, as he talked to the Colonel. Murphy paused for a moment, appearing to reflect. "If you have any hopes for a future in the county seat, as I understand that you do, you will respond to our…suggestions." His tone was firm and loud.

"And what do you suggest, sir?" The Colonel replies.

Pacing back and forth, with his hand on his chin, Murphy suddenly stops pacing. "Full military attack. **Destroy them!**" His demand is contradicting his previous request of not drawing attention to Lincoln. _What in the hell was Murphy doing? _

Much to my surprise, as Murphy keeps on talking to the now confused Colonel, Yen unexpectedly leaps out of the carriage, and starts running towards the house we're trapped in! _Oh my God! What is she thinking?_

"China!" Murphy shouts, as Yen runs closer to the house, weaving in and out of the many soldiers and other men who were standing by. "Soldiers…stop her!" He demands, running after her. "**China!**"

Yen ignores Murphy, and is running as fast as she can. "Yen!" Doc shouts, as we see two soldiers begin to race after her. Doc raises his rifle and fires at the soldiers. A bullet hits the ground, stopping the soldiers from catching Yen.

She reaches the house, at the same time as Doc runs downstairs. "Cover me!" He commands, throwing me his pistol. Billy and I stand at the window, making sure no one else was going to approach the house.

"There you go, Colonel!" Murphy starts sputtering, his arms waving in the air like a mad man. "Your troops have been fired on! You're in the right now! Burn it!"

What was that? _Burn the house? Oh, shit! _

"But…the girl…" The Colonel starts to speak.

"Burn it!" Murphy screeches at Colonel, fuming with anger.

"Excuse me?" The Colonel sputters, the perplexed look still on his face.

"**BURN IT!**" Murphy commands. The Colonel stares at Murphy for a moment, and then starts shouting orders to his men.

"Billy!" I gasp, glancing at him, still staring out of the window. The troops begin to take position, spread out on all sides of the house. "What are we going to do?"

"We'll be okay, Jessie." He tells me.

Right when Doc and Yen make it upstairs, the firing begins, as I scramble back on the ground, under the window, awaiting my chance to return fire. Glass breaks, chips of wood are flying through the air, among the ammunition being shot at us.

I hear Susan scream, and look over at the sound of her voice. Alex is holding her close, as they take shelter behind a large steamer trunk.

"Hold your fire!" I hear the Colonel from outside. "Goddamnit! Cease fire!"

With Billy at my side, we shoot back, as Chavez, Doc and Steve do the same on the other side of the house. We manage to hit some of the men, but the firepower down below is too much for us to handle. _We have to escape; it is our only way out! I know this now…Billy must understand this._

Reloading my shotgun, I notice Charlie, petrified with fear, gripping his rifle in one hand, and his pistol in the other. "Hey, Billy…" He stutters, eyes welling with tears. "I gotta go. I got a wife…she's a sweet Mexican gal…I gotta go…"

I'm shocked to see Charlie this way. He's always been so rough, so tough. I believe that he has finally reached his breaking point. _He's completely lost his mind._

Billy stands up; a determined look on his face, taking control of the situation. "If you don't stand up and whup some ass, you're never gonna see her again! C'mon, Charlie!"

Charlie just sits there, his face white with fear, tears streaming down his face. I want to say something, to do something that would make Charlie feel better…but what can I do?

"Well, they lit it, boys." Steve yells. "They lit the house!"

"**Bloody fucking hell!**" I screech, glancing at Billy. For the first time since we've been in the McSween home, I see worry register on his face.

"Mr. Bonney! Ms. Tunstall! Mr. McSween!" A voice shouts from outside. "This is Colonel Nathan Dudley out of Fort Stanton! Come on out with your hands high!"

Billy cackles at this. "…With your hands held high! I better reason with him." Billy gets close to the window, still laughing. "Hey, Colonel Shithead! You can kiss my ass!"

"**Goddamnit, Billy!**" Alex cries out in frustration.

"We'll see how they like that one!" He laughs. "Get President Hayes down here, and we'll come out! How do ya like that?"

They fire on us yet again, as we all scramble for shelter. _I don't think they liked that one. _I'm again on the ground, wondering when this whole thing would stop.

Now Charlie's yelps are joining Susan's screams. I look up at him, watching as he shakily re-loading his rifle. "**Hey, Kinney!**" He shouts, as the attack on us stops for a moment. "You bastard! I'm gonna shoot your ass from here to Patricio and back, if I have to, you shit dog!" Charlie starts to shoot his rifle.

"Yeah, Charlie!" Billy encourages him.

"**Maniac!**" Charlie is still screaming and shooting. He throws down the now empty rifle, and grabs his other one, and continues to shoot.

"Yeah, Charlie, YEAH!" Billy encourages him, holding his six shooters up. "Go on, Charlie, YEAH!"

I just stare at Billy, then at Charlie. They both seem to be in their own world at this moment. My eyes wander over to Chavez, as he slinks about. I raise an eyebrow as he moves to the corner of the wall and stands there for a moment looking frightened, looking like he has reached the end of this tether.

I smell the fire, and actually see the flames now. The room is getting smoky, and I start to cough. Billy rushes over to me, concerned.

"Alex!" Doc cries out. "Get Susan outta here!"

"**NO!** I don't want to-Alex, no!" Susan shrieks, holding plates, letters and papers in her hands, as Alex grabs her by the upper arm, they descend the stairs.

"Hold your fire!" I hear Alex shout from downstairs. "There's a woman coming out!"

"Cease fire!" I hear the Colonel commands. "A lady is coming out!"

I close my eyes, as I listen to Susan's protests. "You can't make me, Alex! What about Jessica? She needs me! **ALEX, NO!**"

I take the opportunity to look out the window. She's closing the gate of the yard, and slowly walks away from the house. As Susan walks away, she stumbles at bit, her eyes on the house, looking back at Alex, who is still downstairs.

Susan walks up to the Colonel. "You need to go across the street, ma'am, so I may attend to my duties." He tells her.

"The Colonel can't help you now," Murphy interrupts. "But, back at his tent perhaps!" Murphy laughs loudly at his joke, as most of the men laugh with him. _That bastard! _My eyes narrow with hatred for this man.

I can barely hear what is said, as I witness Susan smack the Colonel in the face. "**Animal! Murderer!**" She begins to scream, as the soldiers take her away.

The smoke and flames get worse. Alex and Steve try to put out the flames, but to no avail.

"Where's Chavez?" Steve asks.

"I don't know!" Doc yells.

"He's gone!" Charlie says in amazement. "Must of skinned out."

"He skinned out!" Steve starts to yell, as he stomps on the floor. "That fargin' Indian greaser…I knew he wouldn't stick! He skinned, and we're all gonna die in here!"

I stare at Steve, my mouth open in surprise as he punches the adobe wall in frustration. The house is almost entirely engulfed in flame.

I look around the room. Everything seems to be moving in slow motion. I look out the window, and see the sun starting to crest over the hills. _How did we get to this point? How did I get here? _

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**_Hope you liked that! I'll update soon...I promise!You all know what to do! Click on the little "go" button! Thanks!_**


	12. Exodus

**Chapter XII Exodus**

**Promises and Dreams**

**By tk421beth**

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**A/N: It's astounding to me how the human brain works. An unknown word, image or feeling can make you relive an event, or return you to a dream in your earlier life. Sometimes, the event can be so real and so vivid; it's hard to determine whether you are truly there or not. I'm also convinced that such an occurrence is a safety mechanism, or a protection instrument that your brain uses to block or lessen focus on certain stimuli's.**

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**_Chapter Summary: Time for another history lesson, so grab your pencils! John Tunstall left England in 1872 for Victoria, British Columbia. He left British Columbia to become a sheep farmer in California, but land prices were too high. He arrived in Lincoln, New Mexico late 1876. _**

**_In 1872 Jessica was ten years old._**

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**A special note to all the readers: Hey there! Sorry this took so long, but I needed my beta, Sue, to check this out for me! Hope you enjoy this final chapter of 'Promises and Dreams.'**

**I can't tell you how much I love to read your reviews! I am planning to do a small epilogue/chapter, then onto the further adventures of Jessica Tunstall and Billy the Kid in Young Guns II!**

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**Special thanks again to my betas, Sue and Tom! You both make my rockin' world go round!**

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_London, England 1872_

_I awoke to the gentle sound of rain on my window. I lay there in a large feather bed, with a heavy quilt pulled up around my neck. The sun was already up and the soft rays of light that escaped the clouds did their best to chase the shadows from the center of the room. It took me just a second to get my bearings…I was at my Aunt's estate in Hackney. _

_A wave of excitement swept over me, as I looked around the room. In the shadow laden corner was a large steamer trunk and a carpet bag that I would live out of, for the next two months. Today was the day of our great exodus._

_I quickly threw off the quilt and jumped out of bed. The stone floor was cold under my bare feet as I ran through the chamber door. _

_The house was abuzz with activity. I looked across the large common room and saw my Father. He was every bit the English gentleman, and looking like a maestro the way he was conducting everyone's movements. He turned his head and as his eyes met mine. A smile crossed his face as he gave some instruction to the coachmen. The men nodded and quickly left the room. Keeping my gaze, my Father crossed the carpeted floor that separated us. 'Today's the day!' He told me, with excitement that mirrored mine. _

_He placed his hand under my chin and raised my head. 'You can't know how much I love you.' He bent down and kissed my forehead. I grabbed him around his neck and hugged him. 'I love you too!' I whispered into his ear._

_Father straightened up with me still clinging to him. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me close. I never felt safer or more alive then in my Father's arms. 'We'll have a great new life, Jessica, and I will give you the world!' He promised me as he held me. It couldn't have been more than a few seconds in his embrace, but it left like it was a lifetime._

_Father put me down and told me to get ready. 'We leave for the docks at noon.' His attention was diverted by a passing servant. 'Carlton, see that Miss Jessica's things are taken care of.'_

'_Yes, sir, right away sir.'_

_Father was off again, directing people as he disappeared around a corner._

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_Standing on the deck of the ship, I held tightly onto the railing, as we slowly left England. It was the only world that I knew, and I was leaving… along with it, the pain of losing my Mother._

_My Father had promised me the world, and I knew he wouldn't let me down. I could feel the deck move under my feet, as the ship changed direction. A loud whistle sounded as the wind shifted. I found myself in a bellow of smoke from the stack. I fell to my knees coughing, and heard somebody shouting my name…_

"…Jessie…**JESSICA!**"I hear Billy shout, shaking me by the shoulders, as I snap back to reality. I looked into his blue eyes and feel my heart sink, as I realize that he was not my Father. _My father is dead. _A renewed feeling of hate swelled over me, understanding that the man who caused my Father's death was just outside.

"You have to get us out of here. _We _have unfinished business with Murphy." I solemnly tell him. The fire is totally out of control now, black smoke everywhere.

Alex is busy flinging his personal belongings out of the window. Hat boxes, bundled papers and various sized steamer trunks are being flung outside. Steve is helping Alex, as the fire gets even worse.

"Sweetheart…" Billy touches my arm. "There's only one way out for us."

I look up at him, noticing his face is dirty from the smoke. My eyes are beginning to water and I'm not sure if it's from the ash, or my fear of getting killed. I still can't believe that Chavez would actually leave us all here to die. _For the first time, I feel afraid…_

"I want you to follow Doc, Yen and Charlie out. It's the only way."

I nod, wondering if this will be the last time I would see Billy. I feel tears slide down my cheeks, silently praying that Billy would be all right. _I can't live without him. _

Looking into my eyes, I feel that Billy could read my mind. Placing his hand on my shoulder, a smile crosses his face. "I have a plan."

Billy continues to smile. "I'll make sure that you and I will get out of here alive, sweetheart." He whispers. "I can promise you that."

Billy walks over to one of the last large steamer trunks that are in the room. He starts emptying the contents out of it, calling Alex and Steve over. "This is our only chance, boys. I want you to pitch me out the window in this trunk."

Alex looks at Billy, then at Steve in dismay. "Have you lost your mind, Billy?"

"I may have, Alex. But I haven't lost my nerve!" He grins. "Okay, listen up pals. When this here trunk hits the ground, I want you all to skin out the side door…and when you hear me teachin' these boys how to dance, you make a break for it!"

Alex just stood there, dumbfounded. "Billy…you're insane! This will never work!"

Billy smiles one of his boyish smiles. "You may be absolutely right, Alex! But you only have thirty seconds to come up with another plan!" He chuckles, as he pulls out his watch…_the watch that my Father gave him_. "Tick-Tock! Tick-Tock! Time's runnin' out, Alex!" He looks around the room for a moment. "Guess no one else has a better plan! Guess we're goin' with this one!"

He looks over at Alex and Steve, and tells them to throw out more trunks and personal items out of the window. Before anybody can dispute his wild scheme, he steps into the large steamer trunk. "Damn! This is gonna be fun! Who has more fun than us?"

"Billy!" I gasp. "Be careful!"

He looks at me quizzically, and then smiles. "Like a babe in his Mother's arms, sweetheart!" He squats down, his guns drawn, as Steve closes the trunk.

"Let's do it boys!" I hear his muffled voice state from inside the trunk.

As Alex and Steve toss the trunk outside, I run to the other side of the room, holstering my shot gun on my back, and drawing my six shooters. _I'm ready._ AsDoc and Yen rush up behind me, I give Charlie a nod, and he kicks open the side door.

We run out just in time to see to see the lid pop open on Billy's Pandora's Box. Everyone is taken by surprise, as their attention is drawn to us running into the street. Just then Billy keeps his word, and teaches those bastards how to two-step!

"**It's a ho-down, boys!**" I hear him shout, as his guns blaze and bodies drop.

I was thrilled to see that Billy was okay, now standing outside the trunk, shooting like crazy. It seemed that every soul was caught off guard by Billy's stunt. Taking cover behind Charlie, I shoot towards the soldiers surrounding the Gatling gun. I manage to kill one of them, as I try to scramble over to Billy.

The army and the Sheriff's Posse fire repeatedly at us. I aim and shoot another soldier who is trying to start the Gatling gun.

"**REGULATORS!**" I hear a shout ring out. Surprised, I turn my head to see Chavez riding his horse, with the rest of our horses close behind him. Jumping over a wood pile and smashing through the front line, I was relived to see that he had come back for us. _So, that's where he went! I knew Chavez wouldn't skin out! He's helping us escape!_

Yeah, Chavez! **Yea-ah!**" I hear Steve cry out with joy.

I raced over to my horse, bullets flying by me. Shooting back, I finally make it to my mare. I quickly mount and ride away. She gets shot in the side. As she falls, I hurriedly leap out of my saddle, and land safely on the ground. My poor horse, now lying on the ground, lets out an earsplitting whine, and then dies right in front of my eyes.

I look back down the street, to see Billy had made his way over to the Gatling gun. With the last bullet in his pistol, he dispatches the last soldier assigned to this weapon. Billy turns the Gatling gun toward the front line, and opens fire. I hear him cry out with glee. "**It's _really_ a party now, boys!**"

**_Tack-tack-tack-tack-tack-tack!_** _The sound of the Gatling gun is deafening_! I'm just able to hear Charlie's voice command me to get on the back of his horse. I dumbly look up at him in surprise. He heaves a sigh, and grabs me by my waist, pulling me up behind him.

Steve quickly rides by us, leading Billy's horse with him. As he passes, he turns to me and smiles. "Billy said we'd get outta here alive! He's always kept his promises!"

On the other side of us, Doc is mounting his horse with Yen behind him. He motions us to follow him, as they promptly ride away.

I watch as Steve reaches Billy with his mount, and we start to head out of town. Bullets flying all around us, we prepare to make our great Exodus.

Some of the soldiers are now re-grouping behind a turned over wagon, where they took refuge from Billy's onslaught of bullets from the Gatling gun.

Charlie puts his hands to his face. "**We're skinning out of here!**" He bellows. Moments later, Billy mounts his horse, and rides out with Steve following close behind. I hold onto Charlie's waist, as his horse takes off with a fast gallop, following Billy.

We ride through town at break neck speed. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Alex step clear of the inferno, cheering us on, his Bible held up high in his hand. _We're all safe. We made it! _

All of a sudden, I observe Alex drop to his knees; a barrage of bullets strikes his chest and shoulders. I feel my soul get heavier as another part of me dies along with my Father's best friend.

Billy suddenly stops his horse, and starts to ride back into town. "What the hell are you doing!" Demands Charlie.

"It's not over! Those bastards are gonna pay…besides, I left my pocket watch!"

Charlie turns his horse around to leave, as a bullet grazes the side of my head. The impact is such that it knocks me over. As I'm falling to the ground, I grasp hold of Charlie's 30-30, which is tied to the saddle, hoping it would prevent me from falling off his horse.

Gasping for air, as the blood drips down the side of my face, I end up falling to the ground, Charlie's 30-30 now in my hands.

Shots are being fired upon me, but like at Blazer's Mill, I am determined not to fall in defeat. _I will not die today. I have a purpose. _I notice Murphy blanketed behind armed bodyguards as the chaos explodes. _If I can just get to Murphy, I'd be satisfied._

My hands clinched with rage around the rifle, as my mind reeled with thoughts and emotion of loved ones stolen from me by this devil masquerading as a man. Anxiety and fear filled me as the last person I truly loved galloped to his certain death, and for what? A pocket watch, the watch my Father had given him. I never understood the relationship that Billy and my Father had. But on this day, I came to realize, there is a thin line that separated stupidity from honor, and Billy had a way of dancing on that line.

I noticed the Soldiers, along with the Murphy/Dolan men stood wide eyed and open mouthed as Billy came thundering into view. I quickly got to my feet; all thoughts of self preservation and fear melted away, and were replaced by anger and the understanding that this was the end.

_If Murphy was going to take anything else from me, it would be all or nothing. _I could hear Charlie and Steve yelling at me to get down, as I searched the crowd at the other end of the street and found my target.

Murphy was pre-occupied with Billy's charge, and made his way towards the center of the road. I could hear him barking out orders as the shooting started once again. Billy's six-shooters were ablaze, and men were dropping like wheat through a thresher.

I stood in the center of the street, Charlie's 30-30 raised to my eye. Blood was coursing down the side of my face from the bullet that had un-horsed me earlier. _Nothing mattered anymore, nothing but the eradication of this demon come to earth._

Charlie and Steve found cover and started firing into the assembled men at the north end of the street. Murphy focused his attention to the new threat. As he turned, his eyes met mine.

"**Reap the whirlwind, Murphy, you bloody tyrant!**" I proclaimed, as I made things right in my mind.

The bullet struck Murphy in the center of his forehead. I lowered the rifle and watched Murphy drop to the ground. The single bullet that struck Murphy seemed to be like the same blow on the fragile wall that held back a sea of emotion; seeing this man that erected this wall crumble to the ground mirrored its demise.

I stood in the middle of that street, a sixteen year old girl, without a family. As a wave of emotion flooded over me, I fell to my knees and began to weep.

I was too numb to notice Dolan on his knees, cradling Murphy in his arms. "**You limey fucking whore!**" He shouted, pulling out his pistol.

I looked up in time to see the puff of smoke bloom from the end of his gun. Before I could do anything, Steve was unexpectedly on top of me, knocking me to the ground.

Steve looks me in the eyes and smiles. "Jessie…tell Chavez there really is a Spirit Horse." He closes his eyes, and dies in my arms.

I feel a tug on my shoulder. I look up to see Billy, with a concerned look on his face. I quickly grasp his arm, and he pulls me in front of him.

"**This ain't over yet, Dolan!**" Billy shouts, as we gallop through town.

"**You betcha ass it ain't over, Bonney! I'm gunnin' for ya! The army is gonna be gunnin' for ya! The whole goddamned New Mexico territory is gonna be gunnin' for ya…you and your limey sweetheart shooter, too!**"

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_**Hey! You know what to do! Click on the little 'go' button and review! **_

_**I am going to put another chapter up in a few days. Mind you, it's just the epilogue! Only a few pages long!**_

**_My Young Guns II story is going to be uploaded soon! I'll email all my faithful reviewers (you all know who you are!) when I upload it!_**


	13. Epilogue

**Chapter XIII Epilogue**

_**Promises and Dreams**_

**By tk421beth**

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**A/N: Well, here it is folks…the ending of 'Promises and Dreams.' I can't believe I finished it! This is the first fan fiction that I have _ever_ finished!**

**By the way…I kept Charlie Bowdre alive! Truth –vs. - fiction: Charlie didn't die at the McSween shoot out in Lincoln! Besides, I wanted to keep him in my story! How I _adore_ fan fiction! I can do anything _I_ want! (Insert evil laugh here).**

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**_History lesson! Did Billy the Kid really kill Lawrence Murphy? Nope! As much as Billy hated Murphy, he did not! In 1877 Murphy was diagnosed as having terminal cancer of the bowels (gross!) and left the running of his business to James Dolan. Murphy drank loads alcohol, per his doctor's orders, to kill the pain of his cancer, and spent much of his time in a drunken stupor. He died in Santa Fe, New Mexico on October 20, 1878._**

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**Thanks to Tom, my best friend, husband, and writing partner who at first, told me that this "fan fiction thing" I was doing was stupid and gay; but he is now _totally_ involved in this story! Thanks also to Sue, my friend, co-worker and beta! Thanks for correcting my simple spelling errors that I didn't catch, giving me some great ideas and the support I needed before I uploaded new chapters! (I need a lot of encouragement!).**

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**A lot of hugs and kisses to my ever faithful reviewers: Jo, Amber, Tiffster aka: Emilio's Toothbrush (_where are you?_), MizNite, Moki, and Dana! Thanks so much to each and every one of you for reading and reviewing my story! And to my other reviewers that I did not mention here: Thank you so much!**

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_**Chapter Summary: Jessie just killed Lawrence Murphy, and barely gets out of Lincoln alive. Billy, Charlie, Chavez, Doc, Jessie and Yen escape and head for old Fort Sumner.**_

The sun was beginning to set as we rode towards the direction of old Fort Sumner. I was thankful that Billy has not said one word to me, because right now, I feel emotionally drained at this point.

I carefully touch the right side of my head, hoping the bleeding had stopped. _I was shot at while trying to ride away on the back of Charlie's mare. I am fortunate that I'm still alive. _The bullet only seemed to graze the side of my head. My head did hurt, but the wound wasn't fatal. I wondered who else was hurt.

I softly weep over the loss of Alex and Steve. Poor Steve…shot dead at only twenty years old. And what was Susan going to do now?_ What was I going to do now? Does Billy want me to stay with him? Am I going to be sent to live with Susan?_

I recollect about myself killing Lawrence Murphy. _An eye for an eye. _A part of me felt that vengeance had been met.But as Dolan told Billy, this wasn't over. _What is going to come about? Will we be running from Murphy's men all our lives?_

Billy's strong arms were around me, as he navigated his horse around the wild terrain. "Remember, sweetheart…I'll take care of you." He spoke softly in my ear.

_Billy had got me out of Lincoln alive, as he said he would. He keeps all of his promises. _

Wiping the tears from my eyes, I vaguely become aware of Doc, Yen, Charlie and Chavez still riding with us. My heart soared at the sight of them.

We all stopped riding just outside of old Fort Sumner to say our goodbyes. Billy dismounted quickly, and then gently helped me get off his mare. He looked at the side of my head his face full of worry.

"Let me check her, Billy…" Doc walked up to me, staring at me with a worried look.

"It's not much of a wound…the bullet hardly hit me, Doc." I explained, standing still as Doc's skillful hands checked the wound on the right side of my head. "I kept pressure on it, like you had explained in the past, to do with a injury like this." I smiled over at Yen, who was still on their horse. She smiled back at me.

"The bleeding has stopped. You were right…the bullet just barely grazed you." He smiled. "You're going to make a great doctor, Jessica." He smiled.

Doc seemed torn…I think a part of him wanted me to go with them, as he tried to persuade me to go, but I declined the offer, informing Doc that he needed to take care of Yen now.

"You take care of yourself, you hear me?" Doc told me, his blue eyes watering a little, as he hugged me tight. "You know how I feel about Billy," he whispered into my ear. "Don't let him hurt you, Jessica." I returned the hug, my own eyes damp. Doc spoke to Billy for a moment, shook his hand, and was then off with Yen.

Charlie was going back to Juarez, old Mexico to be with his wife. He told us that we could visit them anytime we wanted. I tried to give him his 30-30 back, but he told me to keep it. "You'll need it, Jessie." Charlie told me, his face red, as he quickly hugged me, and then Billy.

Chavez was headed out of New Mexico, and wanted to spend some time in California and old Mexico. "I think you should come with me, Bonita." He told me in his usual low voice, cupping my chin, forcing me to look up into his brown eyes.

"Chavez…I can't. Not now." I glanced over at Billy, who had his hat off, waving his good-byes to Charlie. "I don't want to leave Billy." I tried to explain.

Chavez chuckled as he mounted his horse. "Remember, Bonita…there is a difference between infatuation and love. Be mindful to where you place your affections." He smiled down at me. "Love given without merit may perceive as foolish folly."

I glared up at him, making Chavez laugh even louder. "You sound like Doc." I finally said with a small smile, when he was done laughing. It was hard to smile though, when the people that I have been close to for the last two years were leaving me.

"Our paths will cross again, Bonita." Chavez told me, as Billy walked up to us, and shook Billy's hand. "Take care of her, Chivato."

"I plan to." Billy told him, with a wide smile. _Billy does plan to take care of me! _I could feel my heart swell with happiness. _He wants me to be with him!_

Billy and I were the only ones left, watching the sunset. _We were the only ones who didn't leave New Mexico. We had no where to go, no kin to take us in._

"I guess it's just us you and me, huh, sweetheart?" Billy asked, his blue eyes sparkling with mischief.

"I guess so." I shrugged, still not sure how he felt about me.

"Well, don't sound so damned disappointed, Jess!" He laughed, pulling me closer to him, gently kissing me.

"You okay now?" He asked, breaking off the kiss, checking my injury.

"Yes." I agreed, smiling at Billy. He smiled back, as he quickly mounted his horse. Billy then held his hand out, and I accepted it, mounting his mare, sitting behind him this time. "Where to, pal?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his waist.

He turned and grinned at me. "How about we go to old Fort Sumner? We can stay there for now."

"I don't care where we go…as long as I'm with you." I boldly told him, as we rode into Fort Sumner.

"Oh, you'll be with me, sweetheart. I'm gonna take care of ya, remember?" He then laughed. "More than pals, sweetheart…_more than pals_."

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**_The further adventures of Jessica Tunstall continue in my next story "Hell Bent for Leather" coming soon! Stay tuned to see if Jessie and Billy stick it out together!_**

_**Thanks again for reading and reviewing! You all make me want to write more! I LOVE YOU ALL!**_


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